Begin Again

Chapter Seven

*TW: Psychological Abuse*

"Why do I look to all these things to keep you happy?"

"So I told him, if you think I won't outbid you in this deal, you've got another thing coming..."

I had been at their dinner table for an hour now and apart from the brief greeting and awkward hugs when I first entered my old home, the conversation hadn't steered to another topic. I continued to pick at the rice and stir fry on my plate.

"...but enough about me. How have you been, Salomé?"

Looking up from plate, I saw my mother eagerly watching me and my father giving me a stern look ,both waiting for my answer.

Clearing my throat, I answered.

"I have been good, father."

Silence filled the room as if the two people in front of me were waiting for more to my answer. It has been five years, I suppose.

"How is Richard, dear?"

I whipped my head to face my mother. My eyes widened slightly as I could hear the thumping of my heart against my chest. It's crazy how his name, alone, can affect me like this. It's crazy how his name used to affect me like this - but positively. Now it's just out of fear.

"He's good, mother. He went on a pilgrimage to Rome with some of the church."

"Why didn't you go with him?" My father interrupted.

"Because he felt it would be unnecessary for me to go."

"Unnecessary? It's about time you went to see the Vatican, don't you think?"

"Yes, father, but it would be more suitable and a more sacred journey for me if I went without other people accompanying me."

"Hm, that is true."

Silence filled the room for the first time this evening, before my talkative father decided to start another conversation.

"Salomé, are you not cold? Your dress is exposing your arms!"

My dress?

***

"What are you wearing?"

"Excuse me?"

"I said," he hissed, as hemlowered himself so his lips were hovering beside my ear. "What the fuck are you wearing?"

I lowered my glance to my black maxi dress with its opened slits covered by the chiffon material, revealing some of my sides, my inner section of my breasts and my stomach, back to my eyes.

"The dress I ordered for tonight?"

"Don't you think it's a little inappropriate?

I mean," he, slowly, lowered his gaze from my own worried eyes to my exposed collar bones and finally rested onto my chest, lust filled in his eyes. "It hardly leaves much to the imagination, don't you think?" he added, sarcasm laced in his voice.

"Well, nobody will be focused on me, especially. After all, it's your night. They'll be more interested in you."

"No, no, no. All those old white men with their 100 year old tuxedos would want to jump your bones seeing you in that dress. They'd want to fuck my wife. Just to spite me. The dress would only be an excuse. Honey, don't you see I'm trying to help you?"

"Help...help me?" I gulped, trying to push back my tears threatening to fall.

"Yes, goddamnit help you!" He barked, flicking his focus back onto my widened eyes. "Those men are savages. Once they notice you're alone, the things they'd do to you is almost so unbearable to mention, but you need to know for your own good."