"The only thing that keeps me sane is either violence or fucking... so unless you wanna bend over for me, I suggest you let me go." He whispered harshly against my neck, pressing me more against the wall with his body, making my breath hitch.
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Anaya POV:
I've been standing under the spray of the shower for so long that the water has turned cold. Oddly though, I didn't feel cold. I didn't shiver or crave the feeling of warmth. I don't feel much of anything right now.
The minute Stacey had opened the door to her house; I had broken down in her arms all over again. The look of horror and worry when she had taken in my tear stained face and bloodied clothes and hands was still in my head. She had asked me over and over again about what had happened and assumed the very worst but I couldn't for the life of me form the words to tell her what exactly was going on.
When she had sprung into action to call my brother, that's when I had snapped out of it and had begged her to not call him. With a lot of persuading and begging, she had agreed, but only if I agreed to tell her everything. I didn't have any other choice in the matter. I needed to talk to somebody or this thing with Caden would end up destroying me – not that it already hadn't.
Pulling me inside, Stacey had pushed me in the bathroom to take a shower and wash off all the blood. Now, standing here, as I looked down at the tiled floor, I could still see the red streaks seeping from my body, into the drainage on the floor. I had no desire to be here. If it were up to me, I would prefer balling up in a corner and crying till there were no tears left in hopes of getting rid of the heartache that I felt.
"Anaya?" Stacey's muffled voice comes through the bathroom door. "You okay?"
No. I'm not okay. I don't know what I am right now but okay was not the word I would use to describe me right now.
Numb
Broken
Those would be much better words, but I don't tell her that either. I don't have the strength to use words. It felt like my body had been drained of all the energy, leaving nothing behind.
"You've been in there forever. Come on out, we need to talk."
With great reluctance, I turn off the water and step out of the shower, my movements almost mechanical, just like the way I've been feeling ever since I drove away from Caden's house. Like a machine, a robot with basic functions without feelings.
So this is what heartbreak feels like, I thought.
Drying off, I get dressed into the clothes Stacey left for me – sweats and tee-shirt. Looking towards the corner of the bathroom, I eyed the salwar I had worn. It lay in a bloody heap on the floor now; totally ruined. How I would explain this to my mother was a problem for later. Looking at my reflection in the mirror, all I saw was a girl who was tired and broken. Caden's words still echo in my head. The way he blamed me, the way he had pushed me away and the way he had crashed my heart.
Looking in the mirror, I felt nothing but disgust over myself. What happened to the once strong girl who didn't give two hecks about guys? The girl staring back at me wasn't her. My life had taken a 360 degree turn in just a matter of days and today was the final blow. Lifting my hand, I observed the cuts on them that had been caused by my bangles. The many thin bloody lines that marred my once smooth skin stood out like a sour thumb.
