The Chaos of a Broken Soul ( Mature Version)

Chapter Three

Caro and Leonore grew closer every day and Kathy became the mother she always wished she had, even Caro's father Greg and his partner Robert treated her as a daughter. Leonore kept them at a distance in regard to her home life and her mental health, she didn't want them to see her as weak and broken. They wore down her hate for physical contact and for her 17th birthday they paid to get her learners, teaching her how to drive. They bought Caro a car for her 16th birthday, which she was able to drive until Caro got her provisional license. When Leonore started dating Danny, it put a strain on their relationship, and they stopped talking for several weeks. Caro didn't like him and hated the way he treated Leonore; it was tiresome playing peacekeeper between them. Leonore hated when they fought as she lost her safe haven to hide from her crappy home life. Which was currently worse as the whore was back and causing shit. Leonore hid it from everyone as she didn't want anyone to know she was struggling and know the havoc she lived in. Leonore hated people to know that she was human, she detested weakness as it reminded her of her mother, and she hated her mother for being weak. Leonore's mother had become an alcoholic because of her stepfather Brian as he was cheating on her and used her as a punching bag. The whore had been in their lives for 6 years on and off, things would settle after she left and then she would be back to cause more havoc. The domestic violence was always there as Brian was a narcissistic asshole and when he wasn't using violence it was emotional abusive. Leonore hated him with every fibre of body as he stole her mother from her and her siblings, her sister Kelly and brother Richard had left home because of him, and she and Jenny were stuck with him. Jenny was 10 years older than Leonore, but she had developmental problems. She didn't talk or walk until she was 2, it also didn't help that her mother's first husband threw her at a wall when she was a baby.

Her mother was bad at choosing men, except when it came to her father, and she divorced him to be with an asshole. Leonore's father Thomas was a good man and was a hero to her, he had served in Vietnam, and he loved her. Though when her mother left him, she stripped him of his parental rights and refused to let him see his kids. Making up lies and it broke her heart. When Leonore was 13, she had enough and got back in contact with her father, she even went to live with him for a little while. However, by that time they were both very different as she had her spirit broken by her mother and Brian. Thomas had become emotionally distant due to the trauma of losing his children again and him serving in Vietnam. Leonore returned to her mother as she was concerned about her safety as Leonore always protected her mother from Brian and she didn't want her father to put up with a fucked-up daughter. When her mother found out that Leonore got back into contact with her father, she attempted suicide by slashing her wrist. Brian blamed her and turned her sister Jenny against her, making her life hell. Leonore still carried guilt with her and blamed herself. Leonore saw herself as broken and unperfect as they made her feel like that, she believed it with all her heart hating herself. She saw herself as unworthy and tried her best to fix whatever was broken inside her as she blamed herself for why her mother didn't love her anymore. There was nothing worse than knowing she wasn't perfect and that she wasn't enough for her mother to love her, she always chose Brian over her and her siblings.

This left a huge hole of emptiness in Leonore as she knew what a happy family was as with her father, they were a family. Filled with love and protectiveness. Her mother didn't drink, looked after her family and was a mother. Leonore smiled at the memories of her early childhood. They used to build cubby houses, camp in the backyard and the trips to visit Nana in South Australia. When they got to Bordertown where her Nana lived, dad would pretend he forgot where she lived, and Leonore would have to tell him. She was the golden child in the eyes of her father, aunties and Nana. They spoilt her and showered her with love, but when her mother took her away that all changed. Now they were strangers and Leonore kept herself at a distance as she wasn't perfect and didn't want to let them close, but she had to protect them, and they stopped trying to get close to her. Leonore only let her Nana love her and she was her whole world as she never expected too much from her, she knew how broken Leonore was. To Leonore she was home and the only place she belonged. Her Nana had this amazing ability to stop the storm that engulfed Leonore and returned her to calmer waters, recharging her batteries to fight another day. It destroyed her when her Nana passed away as she had lost her family home and she no longer belonged anywhere or anyone.