Walk With Me 1

28

Nicki

Jazmine is on the barstool in the kitchen trying to get the little snacks and grapes out of the display bowls. She places them in a supérate plate of hers like o told her to, then sits down with her juice to eat. She seems kinda bored because there are no other kids here.

Bey is with her dad for New Years and her family while Jazz and I are with Robyn and Ariana at the party they're throwing.

Everyone is drinking and dancing and singing along and or gossiping. Not even to mention the flashing lights everywhere.

Jazmine and I are "gossiping" about the others at the party and snicker to ourselves.

She yawns and yawns and yawns.

"Mama."

I take a drink from my water bottle.

"Mama, I'm tired." The four year old says to me.

"Okay, let's go."

She rests her head on my shoulder as I pick her up.

She's almost instantly sleeping. She's gonna have to sleep in her day clothes because I don't want to wake her up.

I kiss her cheek.

I carry her up the stairs.

I can feel and hear her snores.

I lay her in her bed, which is next to my old bedroom and take her shoes off. I slip her bonnet on for the night and lay on the floor next to the bed. It's almost midnight and she freaked out last year with the fireworks so I wanna be here in case she needs comfort.

I lay on my side and take my phone out to shoot Beyoncé a text to check up on her. I set it down, listening to some light music.

I hear something in the next room over, which is indisputably Robyn's. I sit up and wrinkle my nose.

I hope Jazz sleeps through this.

_______________

I hear loud laughing and stumbling and banging against the wall. I get up because I don't want anyone waking my daughter up.

I open the door and see Robyn. She's dressed but the shirt of her dress is a bit hiked up. I know she's drunk off her ass.

I catch her from falling and she gags a bit.

Yep, definitely had a bit to drink.

"Hey, baby."

"Robyn, how much did you have?"

"I'm not sure." She slurs.

She just licks her lips. My eyes widen and I fear a bit for myself, I won't lie.

"Here have some water." I grab the half full one that I set on Jazmine's drawer and give it to her.

The first of the fireworks go off and I sigh when Jazmine awakes, with a jolt and a yelp.

"Mama!"

"Give me a second, baby."

Now I have to deal with a drunk woman and a frightened child. Rihanna keeps the water down and sits at the foot of our daughter's bed.

"Is that mommy?"

"Yes, my darling." I answer.

The ladybug night light is the only light in the room.

"Can we all sleep together?!"

I note Rihanna's sweaty face and baggy eyes. She absolutely needs some rest. She has a queen bed, so it might work. It's a struggle moving Robyn around but it's done.

I help Robyn into the bed and sleep between her and our daughter. She reeks of alcohol and keeps being annoying and I just have lowering patience.

Robyn cuddles into my side.

"Night mommy. Night mama."

"Night baby."

"Night lil girl."

I smack Robyn lightly on the arm.

Almost immediately after, another firework goes off and Jazmine screams.

"Mama." She fearfully begins to cuddle into my side.

I comfort her and hold her close.

When more go off she begins to cry and hyperventilate.

"Mama's here. Nothing will happen to you. Look out the window my love, it's just fireworks."

She puts her hands over her ears and continues to cry. I understand she may have anxiety over this. I don't blame her, I never got over it until I turned 18. Ariana is still not over it and she's almost 30.

"Mommy's here too so nothing will happen to you, I guarantee you."

"Promise?"

"I promise. Close your eyes."

She eventually calms down and gets back to sleep.

I don't go to sleep until 12 pm the next day while Robyn and Ariana clean up.