Dixie
December
~~~
She didn't want to do it at first.
She didn't want to never feel his warm eyes on her, or never hear the beating of his heart as he sleeps again. She didn't want to lose the love of her life.
But something inside of her said she had to. Something told her this was the best thing to do.
I love him so much that I'm breaking, Dixie thought, I'm suffocating in him, his hazel eyes, and his smile, I think a piece of me breaks every time he talks to that other girl.
He's poisoning me, he's like a drug, and I'm addicted, he's ruining me from the inside out, and I'm letting him.
Loving him is destroying who I am.
I don't even know who I am if I'm not with him.
And that's what scares her the most.
She set boundaries and she built walls so that no one could reach her heart. But then he came and she let him decipher her. Dixie slowly lets those boundaries vanish in the hope that she would be able to finally trust again. But then she saw him with her... Another girl. The other girl he's been hanging out with is gorgeous compared to Dixie, she knew she couldn't compete with that.
They're strolling through the cold, crisp snow in early December, holding hands. She can feel his steely hazel eyes glance at her when she decides to stop.
Their love was good. It wasn't great, just good. It was sweet, never lacking anything, always filled with passion and fire. It was fine for the time being, but eventually, she knew that he would need something more, something more than her, or maybe it was her needing something more, but she would break his heart. Every moment that she thought about their relationship and who she was without him if she was even a person at all, she became a ticking time bomb. And when the time was up, he would be a casualty.
And right now, her time was up. Their time was up.
She loved him with all her heart, but she was afraid.
And so she did it.
"No.. I don't believe you." He said in a shaky voice when she told him.
"Believe me. I don't want you anymore." Of course, she was lying, she wanted him, oh god, how she wanted him. More than words could explain, but she was a hurricane and he was so secure and safe, they didn't mix right... Like the chaotic and calm they used to be.
And so she did it...
She broke the love of her life's heart because she was scared.
She could practically hear the sound of his heart breaking into pieces when she said the words. But, once a bomb goes off, there's no stopping it.
And in the cold, snowy winter, not one, but two hearts were broken.
