UNDER HIS SPELL { taekook }

二 ; ２８

The cool breeze swept over Jeongguk's hair and caressed his skin in a delicate, frosty embrace. He lowered his head and took a look at the old iPod in his hands, one that he had pulled from the depths of his drawer earlier in his apartment. The device was adorned with scratches and marks all over, proof of its rather old age and equally constant usage.

It was a gift his mother had given to him, from the birthday that very same year his parents found out he's gay.

Although it wasn't as though Jeongguk ever sat them down and had some kind of 'talk' about it, per se. Rather, he had brought Seojun home after school one day and that was all his folks ever needed to realize what was really going on.

He remembered the birthday note that his mother wrote for him alongside the expensive gift.

'My son', it said. 'Today I'm yet again reminded of the reason my life is so full of color. Thank you for being born. Thank you for allowing me the chance to love you with everything I have. My dear boy, Mama loves you very much. Happy birthday; to my most cherished treasure, Jeonggukie.'

Jeongguk remembered crying on the spot, right then and there, beside his birthday cake; leaving his mother and father at a loss for words. Eventually they both wrapped him into their embrace, and the family of three sat on the floor crying for what felt like hours to him back then.

They all understood the gravity of their emotions.

That day, Jeongguk learned that his parents would accept him no matter who he chose to love, what he chose to do with his life. Whether he took over the bakery or not. He'd always dream of making them proud. To grow into a strong, capable man that could take care of them the same way they took care of him.

Naturally, that was his first experience with unconditional love. Something a family can give to each other no matter the distance, and no matter how much time may pass them by.

"Hm.. Hmn, hm..." He hummed to himself quietly, sat upon the grass below him as he gazed out across the Han River, its waters glinting in an orange glow while the sun readied to go to sleep. He scrolled through the playlist his mother had made him so that he'd have something to listen to the very minute he opened up his gift back then, and a gentle smile curled over his lips as the warm memories came back to him.

He used to love a lot of the same songs his parents would play out loud in early hours on lazy weekends. Listening to them now only made him wish they were here with him now.

And maybe they would know what to do, about his aching heart.

They always knew what to do. It seemed they had all the answers, and yet... Jeongguk also knew this was something that held no right answer. Something his parents couldn't quite solve for him right away with the snap of a finger, the way they used to when he was small.

His head fought with logic; with his heart and with his desires.

Jeongguk brought his legs up to his chest and propped his chin over his knees. With only one earbud in, he could hear the gentle brushing of water waves crashing over each other in the distance.

"Write a message to someone—with your voice."

Taehyung's words ricochet off his thoughts, from that night they met. It resonated loud in his head, deep voice rang in his ears with how vivid the night had been to him.

"If you don't put your all into it, the person won't receive your letter. So you have to really make sure they hear you."

He wasn't sure how long he sat there, gazing over the riverbed. But he had some idea, judging by the way the sky had fallen completely dark before he even came to realize it.