Him | k.sj.

.4

We started against the wall, kissing each other as if we were living our last day. It began slowly, but I became greedy. Desperate. Seokjin tried to speak and I wouldn't let him. He gave up and took control of the situation like I wanted him to. Once we peeled from the wall, we disappeared into the bedroom.

I lowered the jacket from his broad shoulders, fighting against his shirt that wouldn't let up. Seokjin shook his jacket off and I removed my tank top and unclasp my bra. The glare in his eyes, seeing my straps dangle along my shoulder, told me this would be anything but gentle. He removed his shirt before I heard whistles of his belt undone. My gaze fell to his finger on the rim of his pants, lowering them along with his boxers, his erection sprung free, causing a whimper from my throat.

The minute my skin freed from my garments, his kisses began again. Soft kisses tickled my thighs until trailing to my stomach. Seokjin hovered over me, the lustful glare hooded as he leaned closer. Desire dripping from the tip of his girth onto the inside of my thigh as he waited for an invitation. "Hazel?" He whispered.

Knowing I had Seokjin here in this moment erased the taunts of his ex girlfriend, but the fear of him being in contact with her once again after we agreed to keep this friendship is unnerving. Why does he run to her when we disagree? The only way to be sure is to ask him, but it would spark a new argument. Perhaps kissing him was a mistake, and now we are back here, adding to our pain.

But I needed him right now. "Please Seokjin," I pleaded as I spread my legs, gripping him as he filled me. His kisses suppressed my moans from the adjustment, though the process will take some time. Tears filled my eyes, but I turned away, allowing his kisses to covet my neck instead.

I was wrong. Dead wrong.

Seokjin's was nothing but gentle. Tender kisses. Soft touches. Slow and steady strokes, dragging out our pleasure. The delicate moans of my name from his lips drove me into euphoria before every climax. The brushes of his fingertips down my back teased me before he gripped my waist. This is more than I expected. This intimacy felt different from our after holiday party make-up session. Seokjin's glare softened before he kissed me and his hands explored areas of my body I've only dreamed of.

"Hazel," the sound of my name dragged from his lips. I closed my eyes, falling even more in bliss of him. An image of my last time with him came to mind. Feeling him inside me then magnified the passion between us now. I'm on edge again.

I attempted to increase my pace, but Seokjin slowed me down. "Don't rush it," he breathed. He's been taking his time with me throughout our session-this is definitely different from the last. Everything from his form. His words. He didn't want to rush, and he savored every facet of our pleasure-unlike the sex we had back in December.

Seokjin was making love to me.

My heart grew full at the thought of this. I opened my eyes to see him staring at me. What started as lust in his eyes now entailed something lighter, softer. Seokjin gulped, as if he read my mind and realized I knew his intention.

What were we doing?

Is this his way of telling me he wanted something more? He made the choice of us remaining friends because he thought our first time was too fast for us. Has he changed his mind? Now I feel as if my greed of needing to remind myself of his closeness to me stirred up emotions I'm not ready to face. This is a mistake.

I tried increasing my pace once more and this time, Seokjin allowed it. He's already more than I can handle and with this steady, yet harder pace, my soul is close to ascension. Moans, breaths and name calling echoed in our space. My bedroom soon became a chamber of carnal secrets.

"I'm close," his shaky breath whispered. I leaned my forehead against his, whispering naughty nothings in his native language, driving him crazy with every thrust. "Fuck," Seokjin muttered as he released. I held him tighter, tears streaming from my eyes, from his pleasure against my walls. The minute our breaths grew to a steady rhythm, Seokjin's thumb brushed the tears underneath my eyes. "Why are you crying? Did I hurt you?" He asked.

I shook my head, lowering in embarrassment. He couldn't hurt me. Seokjin wouldn't hurt a fly. However, I believed I've tainted what we built going on four years from selfishness.

"Hey," he called. "What's the matter, Hazel?" Seokjin's voice echoed with concern and I remained cowardice in facing him.

"Nothing. I'm going to shower, okay?" I spoke and leaned away from him, hurrying towards the bathroom and closing the door behind me.

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