The Love Letters (Larry Stylinson)

Chapter 11

When I wake up the next day, the first thing I see is a pair of long, pretty eyelashes.

I move a little to see who's lying next to me. Their arms are wrapped around my body, their legs are tangled with mine.

"Who..."

I try to sit up, but they're holding me too tightly.

"N-no... mine!"

Wait. I know this voice.

"L-Louis?"

"Mhh."

Oh my god. He looks so adorable when he's sleeping. He's so tiny! But now to the important things: what happened yesterday??

"Did we fuck?"

Louis' eyes open immediately. "What?!"

Alright. Apparently we didn't. But...

"Why are we cuddling?"

"Uhm-" Louis removes his arms. "Can't you remember... yesterday?"

"Not really... wait, so we did fuck?"

"No, Harry, we didn't. Don't worry."

"Oh."

Louis looks at me, worryingly. "Are you alright?"

"I think so, why?"

He sighs. "What can you remember from yesterday?"

"Oh. Uh, wait. I helped Zayn preparing the party. We got in an argument but then everything was fine again. Then the people arrived and a random girl started flirting with me. Then I fled and I met Lucas- oh my god do you know him? He's so hot what the fuck- so yeah I tried to flirt with him but I don't think it worked, then I danced with Pam and then people brought me more and more alcohol, and then..."

Louis sees the expression on my face. He grabs my hand. "Can you remember more?"

"It's blurry... but... someone touched... me?"

Louis hugs me.

"Did I get... raped?"

"I don't know but I think so. Suddenly, you were gone, and I searched you, and when I found you in a bedroom, you were naked, hurt and very sleepy. I think they mixed KO-pills into your drink. You were very weak, you acted like a little child. I tried to carry you home."

I don't answer. Louis bites on his lip. "This might sound dumb but... are you alright?"

"No, I'm not fucking alright. Someone raped me!" I turn away from Louis and bury my head in my hands. My fingers are trembling.

"I fucking know, Harry. I'm so sorry. I should've paid more attention to you. I feel so fucking bad." Is he crying? It sounds like it. Why is he crying? He didn't get raped.

The man sits down on my face and puts his dick in my mouth.

My whole body starts to shake. What did he do to me? Did he use a condom? Did he hurt me in a physical way?

"Louis!"

"Yes, Harry?"

"I was raped."

"You were."

I start crying. "The memories are coming back... step by step."

"Yeah?"

"Yes... he sat on my face, and h-he..." I can't even finish the sentence.

"Fuck, Harry..." He pulls my head on his chest and starts caressing my curls. "You don't deserve this... you're such a beautiful person, inside and out, nobody should benefit from you like that..."

The contact with his fingers actually calms me down. "The memories come back, but like in pieces... he called me a fag and he hit me..."

The look in Louis' eyes was angry, sad and kind of broken. "I fucking hate that man so much. How did he dare hurting you like that? I don't understand why people do this."

"D... do you think he would've done it if I was straight, or if I wasn't out?"

"What do you mean?"

"I think he chose me because I'm gay. He called me a faggot." I wipe some of the tears away. "I really hope he didn't fuck me... I was a virgin...  I don't want that such an old, gross man took it away."

"Wait, you were a virgin? Oh my god, it must've hurt as hell... this man really should die."

"I just feel so used."

"I understand." He softly strokes my chin. "Do you want me to get you some water?"

"That would be really nice, thanks."

Louis stands up and goes to the kitchen- how does he find it that easily?- and I can hear how he grabs a bottle of water. Suddenly, I get the urge to puke. "Fuck, no", I mumble, "Can you get me a bucket, Lou-"

I throw up on the couch and I immediately start to cry again. Louis runs back towards me, he puts the glass of water on the table and he brushes my hair away. He pityingly rubs my back, then he grabs some tissues and wipes my tears away. "Don't cry, Harry. Should I get Mrs. Styles?"

I nod.

Louis presses a little kiss on my hair, then he stands up to get my mum.

"Harry..."

I open my eyes. "Fuck. Don't tell me I fell asleep on my own vomit."

Louis laughs. "You did."

"Fucking hell."

"How are you feeling, Harry?", mum asks.

"Like shit", I answer. "I literally slept on my vomit. That stinks!"

"I'll clean it up. Go shower, please."

"Are you sure? I can clean it too, but later."

"No, Harry. Go shower, it'll make you feel better. Louis, would you go with him so that he won't fall? He didn't walk all day and if the man really.... then he must be hurt."

Louis blushes. "Uhm, I-"

"You don't have to, Louis." I try to smile at him. "I can shower by myself."

Louis looks at my mum, who seems very worried. "No, I'll go with you. Your safety is more important. I excuse myself already in advance in case I'll get a... yeah." He offers me his hand. I grab it and try to get up. The pain in my bum appears instantly. "Fuck."

Mum starts to cry.

I lean on Louis, he puts his arm around my hips, just like before. I limp a lot. I want to cry again, but I want to wait until mum can't see us anymore.

"You need to lead me towards your bathroom", Louis says. I nod. "Yeah."

When we arrive, Louis puts a chair in the shower. "In case you can't keep the balance", he says, and he also places a bucket next to the shower. "If you feel like you have to throw up again."

"This might sound needy, but can you help me getting undressed?"

He nods. "Of course." He takes of my shirt, then he starts unbuttoning my trousers. Fuck. This must be very disgusting for him, since I'm full of vomit. But he just simply puts my clothes away and washes his hands. Then he turns around and faces my body.

"Harry... I don't want to lie, you have a lot of scars."

I look down at my upper body. He's right. I look awful. I turn around and look at my bum. The cheeks are red and look violated. My sight gets blurry, again. "Fuck. I'm so sorry, I don't want to cry that much."

"Don't excuse yourself, you did nothing wrong, and it's completely normal that you cry that much."

"My virginity's gone. So is my dignity."

Louis hugs me carefully. "I know, Harry. And this is literally so wrong, but you can't change the situation anymore. Try to think of everything you remember from his looks, alright? Because then we can go to the police."

I nod. "Yeah. Thank you so much, Louis. You're amazing."

He smiles. "I'd do everything for you. And now go shower!"