The Love Letters (Larry Stylinson)

Chapter 13

"Shut the fuck up, babyboy, otherwise I'm going to hurt you more."

I whimper. "P-please leave me... alone... I don't deserve this..."

"Oh please, you can't even finish a proper sentence. Are you sleepy? Oh, how sad. I feel so bad."

He slapped me right across the face and started speeding up. "You are not going to be able to do anything tomorrow. You're going to feel this for- at least- the rest of the week. This is your punishment for accusing me of rape, and for being a fag. Honestly, babyboy, you don't deserve to be alive."

I start to cry. "Stop..." But I can't move. I am too weak.

"Honestly, I should tape your mouth, shouldn't I? Your voice is ugly and annoying. Have you got any tape?"

"N-no...!"

I wake up horrified, drenched in sweat and still trembling. Tears begin to leave the corners of my eyes. "M-mum", I call, "Mum!"

My mum immediately is here. She sits down next to me. "Shh, Harry. You're strong. Stronger than that. Don't let it sneak into your dreams."

I hug her and cry harder. She starts to caress my hair. "It's going to be fine. We're going to tell it to the police and they're going to find him. He's going to get the punishment he deserves."

The punishment he deserves. He said something similar to me. I should be punished for being gay.

"Is it that wrong to be gay?", I ask. Mum looks confused. "What? No, no! It's not wrong at all. It's natural and beautiful. No sexuality is wrong. If it makes you happy, then it's right!"

"But he raped me. That didn't make me happy."

"A woman could've raped you, too. It's wrong, it's so fucking wrong- sorry for cursing- but this has nothing to do with your sexuality, yeah? It could've been every person on that party. Sadly, he chose you. He shouldn't have done it at all in first place, but you were a virgin..."

"I know. I was waiting for the right person. I still am." I nuzzle my face into her neck. "I mean, I don't want to lie, I already did sexual actions with other boys, but not... that." I laugh. "Oh my god, it's so weird to talk about this with my mother."

"It's not! I'm sure lots of boys do that."

"Yeah, no, I'm not really sure about that."

She rolls her eyes. "Let's just forget about this dream, yeah? You need to go to school. Do you have the gift for Louis?"

I nod. "Yes. It lays on my desk." It's a bunch of flowers. I know that he likes blue hyrangea, so I combined them with white roses. I also bought him some chocolate. My excuse is going to be that mum wanted me to buy him something (which actually isn't that false), even though it was my idea to give him a little thank you for what he did. And since we have theatre class together today, I thought that it was a good idea giving it to him when we meet.

Later in school, Zayn looks at me with a smirk on his face. "Alright, who are these flowers and this chocolate for?"

"Louis."

Zayn laughs. "Funny, bro. No but seriously now, who are they for?"

"Louis!"

"Bro, stop joking, I know he likes you."

I stop talking.

Zayn looks at me, confused. "Wait- are you being serious?"

"Yes! I am! God", I shake my head.

"Oh my god, why?"

"He helped me with something."

"With what?"

"I don't want to tell you yet. Maybe later."

"Harry, is it important?"

"Yes, it is."

"Why did you tell Louis and not me? I'm your best friend."

"Because Louis has seen it, okay?! You don't understand it. I promise, I will tell you about it sometime, but not right now because I'm simply not ready, yeah?"

He sighs. "Alright. I really hope you're okay."

"Zayn, don't worry about me. It's not worth it, I swear."

"Maybe I should just ask Louis..."

I look at him. "If you do that, I'll never talk to you again."

"Alright, alright. But that's the only secret you're keeping from me, right?"

"Yes, of course. Actually, wait." I think about it for a second. "Have I told you that Gemma has a boyfriend, now?"

"No, you haven't, but that's okay. It's not that important."

"Excuse you? It is. Imagine if he was abusive!"

"Is he abusive?"

"No. He's actually very nice."

"Well, then it's alright, isn't it?"

"...yeah. It is." I laugh. "Alright, can you please hold the flowers and the chocolate for a moment, I need to take something from my locker." With "something" I mean W's letter.

"Of course." He takes the gift. "Why don't you just put it in the locker?"

"Oh. That would be smart." I grab W's letter and put it in my pocket, then I put the gift in the locker. "Alright, bye, Zayn, I need to read the letter now."

He rolls his eyes. "Geez. I don't like your priorities. You put a random boy before your best friend." Then he kisses me on top of my head, ruffles my hair and leaves. I open the letter of my admirer.

"Dear Harry,

Yes, I do know Louis. I'm quite surprised that you used to like him, but what do you want me to say... Also, I don't think he's that short. I mean, there are shorter people in this school, right? I don't know, are you into short guys? I like tall guys, but that's just me I guess :)

Also, my bad for what happened to you at the party. I hope you're feeling better. It must be so weird for you to hear this from a random boy, but the thing is, these letters are really important to me, and it would tear me apart if you weren't fine

I guess I'm too protective of you.

I always try to make you happy. Here is a joke for you: Why did the mushroom go to the party?

Because he was a fun-guy.

Yeah. That's it.

-W xx

PS: I hope you're having a nice day today <3"

Oh my god.

He drew me a heart.

A very ugly one, but a heart.

Oh my fucking god.