One Hundred Days

Day 15 (Part 1)

I woke up cuddled up in the sent of Luke. I opened my eyes and saw on the floor slept Cal and Mikey. I got off the bed, which could've easily fitted Mikey too. I stepped over their bodies and tiptoed downstairs. LIz was in the kitchen cooking. 

"Morning," Liz grinned. Turning around and placing a plate of bacon and eggs on the side,"For you," She jestured, "Go eat in the basement if you want," I headed down the stairs and switched on the TV confused to where Luke had slept as he wasn't down here. I sat on the sofa and gingerly ate my breakfast. I had eaten about half before I felt sick. Second time since getting back. I hope I wasn't sick. I placed the plate on the coffee table. I concentrated on the news that was being reported. I switched on my phone which was on the table too. I checked my twitter and there was so much hate telling me how fat and ugly I was. I let it sink in. It was all starting again. I thought I was olut of that rut. I pulled my knees to my chest. I heard someone(or something) come down the stairs. There was a bark from the bottem of the stairs. There was a dog. I froze. It could smell my fear. 

"Come back at once you dumb dog," Luke called from the top of the stairs, "There's only Chloe down there  Calum is in my room. The dog was staring at me, and I couldn't move and inch. Luke came down the stairs, "Molly, leave her be you only want her breakfast there is probably some bacon upstairs for you," Luke sighed pulling on Molly's collar. 

Mikey came down the stairs with a plate full of food. He glanced at Molly. 

"Chloe, breath. Mol won't hurt you," Mikey said looking at me walking around Molly and Luke and towards me. I didn't say anything nor did I move. 

"Should I take her out," Luke said pulling on Molly's collar. Mikey nodded and put his arm around me whilst he ate his food and watched TV. I was still scrolling through my Twitter feed. I had a load of hate from people from school and complete strangers. Was I that bad a person that strangers hate me? I cuddled into Mike and he glanced at me and put down his food. 

"Always," I asked. Mikey looked into my eyes and wiped the pad of his thumb across the bottom of my eye. 

"Always. You're my sister I will never leave you. Ever," He gentlye kissed my forehead. 

"Mikey. What's this," Luke asked waving around a blue book notebook. My song book. 

"Look inside," Mikey replied shrugging. My chest tightened. I had recently started to write some songs. 

"I think it's a song book. Who's," Luke asked reading, "They're actually really good and real." I sat and watched him. 

"Let me see," Mikey asked. Luke chuched the book. I reread the song on the page.

"I once met this girl,
She's as pretty as can be.
I told her she was beautiful,
But she didn't believe me.

Frustration consumed me,
How could she not see?
Despite the perfection I perceived,
She sees inadequacy.

See, society has taught her,
To hate the skin she's in.
To compare herself to billboards,
To starve until she's thin.

But even if she made it,
Ignored her hunger pain.
Would she finally feel at peace,
Or would her sorrow remain?

Rejection, like an infection,
Breeding victims of disaffection.
So, pardon my interjection,
But we must go a new direction.

This isn't natural selection,
Rather a warped projection.
Women don't need your objection,
They deserve uninfluenced introspection.

I once met this girl,
She's as pretty as can be.
I told her she was beautiful,
But she didn't believe me.

Frustration consumed me,
How could she not see,
Despite the perfection I perceived,
She sees inadequecy.

Shallow words from shallow guys,
Cause pretty girls with tainted eyes.
Forced to believe their twisted lies,
In every mirror, inside she dies.

She cannot feel the love I send,
Despite my honest heart's intent.
I drown her in these compliments,
Yet somehow she still circumvents.

Forget the American dream,
It will destroy your self esteem.
Happy lives need no extreme,
Beauty isn't what they deem.

You are perfect to the seam,
Don't deny you love ice cream.
If you're proud let me hear you scream,
As we burn their magazines.

I once met this girl,
She's as pretty as can be.
I told her she was beautiful,
But she didn't believe me.

Frustration consumed me.
How could she not see,
Despite the perfection I perceived,
She sees inadequacy.

All that truly matters,
Are those who truly care.
The opinions of the masses,
Is neither relevant nor fair.

So believe what I say,
And find happiness once more.
You're beautiful, you're perfect,
Of that you can be sure.

I once met this girl,
She's as pretty as could be.
I told her she was beautiful,
But she didn't believe me.

Frustration consumed me,
How could she not see,
Despite the perfection I perceived,
She sees inadequacy.

What she doesn't realize,
A point she surely missed.
If you're a truly kind person,
Ugliness does not exist.

You could throw away your make-up,
This you should not doubt.
If you are beautiful within,
You are beautiful without," I quietly sang reading it. (I know Onision raps it but yeah) I felt more tears roll down my face

"Holy balls," Mikey mumbled, "These are yours," He glanced at the doodles around the edge, "These are good Chloe." He passed my the book which I held close to me, "Luke, they're Chloe's," Luke's face looked shell shocked. I slowly stood up and pushed past Luke to go have a shower. I walked into Cal. He tried to stop me but  pushed past him. I could barely see through the tears.