Characters

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Emily Rudd as Rosella Maria Swan

Emily Rudd as Rosella Maria Swan

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The broken hearted badass

"I just don't understand what I did to make you hate me so much"

"Fuck off Mike! No one is interested in a man whore that cums in 5 seconds, and can't please a woman to save his life!"

"Fuuuuck, why do you have to be so goddamn cute!"

Kirsten Stewart as Isabella Marie Swan

Kirsten Stewart as Isabella Marie Swan

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The bitchy sister

"You're ruining my life!"

"God, why couldn't Renee and Charlie have stopped at on child?"

"So, Jasper, rumor has that you're interested in me?"

Jackson Rathbone as Jasper Hale

Jackson Rathbone as Jasper Hale

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The lover boy vampire

"Hello there Ms. Swan, you look beautiful today as always"

"Oh Ms. Rosa, will you do me the honor of letting me escort you to prom?"

"I'm not interested, Isabella. I only care about Rosa"

Billy Burke as Charlie Swan

Billy Burke as Charlie Swan

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The supportive dad

"I like Jasper, he's good for you"

"Isabella Marie! If I hear that you're harassing the Cullens one more time I'm shipping you off to military school!"

"I like this new Rosa, she's so happy"

Sarah Clarke as Renee Dwyer

Sarah Clarke as Renee Dwyer

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The judgy mom

"You know, if you lose weight more boys would be interested"

"You should start wearing makeup, Rosa. Your natural face is really homely, and boys don't want a homely girl"

"Your natural hair color isn't pretty. Oh! I know! Why don't you dye it brown to look like Bella? Then it'd be nice"

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