Life With No Games

Chapter 3: Victor's day

I know Peeta is right. We have to tell her, but I can't.

"Peeta," I object, but he stops me.

"Katniss, we both know that we have to tell her. This is the only option unless you have any other ideas."

"We could skip Victor's day." I say, knowing what Peeta will say.

" Absolutely not!" He says. "Plus Effie will never let us miss it."

Tears are flowing more than ever now. Why did the stupid hunger games ever exist! They said it would keep us from having a rebellion and maybe it did for 75 years, but there was one and now I'm stuck telling my kids about the games, telling them why I wake up every night with nightmares, how Peeta and I got to know each other. I reach for the phone in our bedroom. "Peeta," I say quietly. "Can I be alone for a minute?"

"Of course Darling." He says and kisses me on my forehead. As he leaves the room I remember how I would always kiss Prim on the forehead right before she went to bed every night. I dial a number on the phone and it starts ringing.

"Hello?" asks a voice.

" Hi Annie." I say.

" Oh Katniss!" She says. "It's so amazing to hear from you! You know I was just thinking about you and Victor's day."

"Same here." I respond, trying to hold back tears.

Annie releases that I am sad and says "Katniss are you okay?"

"No Annie. I'm pretty sure I have to tell my kids about the hunger games!"

" Oh Katniss," She sighs, and I know she wishes she was with me in person. " I had to do the same thing with Blake and it was really hard, but he was older..." Blake is her and Finnick's son and he reminds me so much of Finnick, which reminds me of when he died, which makes me even sadder.

" I have too Annie." I bury my hands in my face and sob. "I can't let her accidentally find out about it on Victor's day. I mean I can't risk it."

" What about Finn?" Annie asks.

" Oh," I say and pause to think a bit. "He's only five I'm sure he'll forget the next day."

" Your right," Annie agrees. "About everything Katniss. I know this is hard, but you knew this day would come. I know it's hard, but make this day meaningful for Rue, for you."

Annie is right. This needs to be done and it needs to be meaningful. "Thanks Annie." I say. "I can't wait to see you and Blake on Victor's Day!"

" Same here Katniss. This is my favorite part about the hunger games. Getting to see everyone and their families! I heard Johanna's daughter just graduated from elementary school! Oh, she's so big, I can't wait to see her! I'm going to buy her a congratulatory gift!"

I laugh. Annie gets totally off subject sometimes. "I have to go Annie, but it was wonderful talking to you."

" Anytime Katniss. I'll see you soon."

I hang up and sigh. Annie is such a good friend I'm embarrassed that I didn't just sacrifice myself to save Finnick. Then I wouldn't be here, about to tell my kid that I'm a murderer. I dry my tears and make sure I look fine and walk downstairs. I see Peeta stop making dinner and look at me. Rue and Finnick run towards me. I look at Rue and tears fill my eyes, but I wipe them away quickly and walk into the kitchen to help Peeta cook.

"How was the bakery?" I ask, trying to ignore the subject we are both thinking about.

" Great!" He says. "Sold ten loaves of bread, a couple of cakes and some bagels. I'm working on a huge cake for a wedding."