Late Night Heartbreak || P.P. || COMPLETED

Part 19

•chapter 19•

Y/N POV

it's been about a week since peter came through my window, but we have called and text, so we're not completely hopeless. i know he will be here.

however, it's been a few weeks since i've been happy. a few weeks since the day when it all happened. my little brother, jack, was only 14 and died protecting new york.

he would do anything to protect this city, but he didn't stay here for me? i sound selfish, but if you're mourning, surely you're allowed to be like that?

besides that, my family has been on the news many a time.

'the first family to become a victim of the vicious vigilante spiderman! who will be next?'

it's just horrible. they shouldn't be allowed to say bullshit like this. we can't go out anywhere, we're bombarded by news reporters and cameras.

not like i've been out anywhere anyway.

i think it's safe to say we are more popular than spiderman at the moment.

anyone would die for fame, until they realise this is the reality of it..

3RD PERSON

y/n and her parents trudge along, all dressed in black. y/n wore a black dress, which was a V-neck and came mid-thigh. along with that, she also wore a black veiled hat with black, dead flowers decorating the outside.

peter stood next to the glossy coffin, may holding him to her side, wearing a upset expression.

y/ns eyes slightly light up at the sight of peter, but then her head falls slightly. they walk over to the coffin and grave slowly, y/n standing next to peter, gripping onto his hand tightly.

"we are here today, to remember the life of jackson l/n. he was a young boy, died at the age of 14, sacrificing himself for the life of his city. he will never, ever be forgotten." the funeral celebrant begins, "the family of this boy has a few words to say."

Y/N POV

my parents glance my way, teary eyed. i forgot about my speech. i take a step forwards, and walk towards the top of the coffin, where the celebrant just was.

i take a piece of paper out of my pocket. i look at the tear stained page, and then look up, seeing the faces of those i love, and some of the cities inhabitants, including gwen.

i clear my throat, and begin, "those close to my brother know he has always been brave and heroic, thinking he can save the day. i always used to laugh along, telling him 'he'd never be a superhero' but i guess he proved me wrong. he saved all of us, just like h-he wanted," i pause, taking a deep breath. "i know he's always been loving, and caring. there are many a time he'd taken care of me, even if i'm meant to be the strong one. i just hope he gives me that same strength, to get through the rest of my life without him. im going to have to survive, for my boyfriend, parents, and family, without you." i bite my lip, taking one shaky hand away from my paper to rub my eye slightly. "you never, ever realised how much you meant to me, and now you never, ever will. and i will regret not telling you i loved you everyday forever. i'm so sorry for the times i wasn't there, but i know you understand. you always do. so i really, really hope you've gone to a better place, where you are treated like a superhero, because you really were, bud. i.. we, love you so much. and i'll miss you until the end of my life." i finish. i didn't realise a few tears had slipped out of my eyes and left a few trails on my face until i folded the paper, stuffing it in my pocket.

i look towards peter, who gives me a sad smile. i walk towards him, and he pulls me in tightly, squeezing me.

i don't think i could ever get enough of his embraces.

(~•~)

after a few more speeches, from my mom, dad and the celebrant, he was finally buried. it was official. he is truly gone, and there's no way of getting him back.

i don't think i have anymore tears left to cry, but the pain follows me. everywhere. the thought that i had caused my brother's death will haunt me, forever.

the last pile of dirt covers the coffin, officiating the funeral. family and civilians start to depart, going on with their lives. may ends up leaving, kissing peters cheek. my parents end up leaving, giving a kiss to me, and the grave if my brother.

I don't think i'll ever leave. but it must come, and I can't delay it forever. but i can for now.

i sit cross-legged next to the fresh grave, peter sitting next to me. i take the hat off of my head, setting it down beside me, and lean my head on his shoulder.

"i shouldn't of let him run up that building, i could of outrun that cop. it's all my fault" i mutter, messing with my hands.

"it's anyones but your fault, y/n. you couldn't of been more powerful than a police officer, it's really not your fault. i shouldn't of left him on his own, but he insisted.. i-" peter cuts himself off, staring aimlessly into the polished gravestone.

"we shouldn't be blaming ourselves" peter continues "we shouldn't, but it's hard not to in these circumstances."

i hum in agreement, "if there's anyone we should blame, it's dr connors. you can't blame yourself, and i shouldn't"

i feel peter nod, and rest his head on top of mine. he takes my hand in his, interlocking our fingers.

for now, we can be at peace.

sorry for the shorter chapter! hope you're enjoying so far. we're getting near the end of part 1! go us!

stay safe, hydrate and vote sexies <3

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