The Citizen Soldier (DNF)

12) Fear

*Clay POV*

It was getting darker outside and I heard the howl of a wolf. I was starting to understand why George was so scared for me earlier. It didn't only sound dangerous, it also looked and felt dangerous. I decided to give him a bit more time.

After another hour of waiting for him to be seen on the tree-line, a worrying amount of wolf noises and activity, and paranoia, I felt ready to go after him. He'd had enough time, I couldn't let him be killed out in the middle of nowhere in the forest. His family would be worried for his sudden disappearance or at the very least would need to hear about it. I didn't want to be the one to have to break the news.

He also happened to be my best friend. And my only friend. And family.

I grabbed a stick that looked like it would burn bright and long and placed it in the flames for a little while. After it caught, I was off into the forest. With the dark, tall, scraggly looking trees. At night. In the dark. Without the moon.

I swallowed, trying not to think about everything that could be lurking in here. There could be monsters, or zombies, or wolves. Definitely wolves. I couldn't do it, it was so scary. I took a few deep breaths and made a few steps in the direction that George ran off in. If I didn't get to him no one would, and he's sick and hurt. Or something else would.

Bad Clay. Don't think about that.

I shook my head and closed my eyes, running a little and forcefully shoving negative thoughts out of my brain while I ran. Then I collided with a tree and scraped my face on the bark. "Ow, that hurt." I groaned, opening my eyes and rubbing my face. When my fingers came away from my cheek, they were red with blood.

Well I suppose using my eyes is the whole reason I have the torch in the first place, and it's kinda a smart thing. This is why they exist, so that this doesn't happen. Go figure.

I shook my head to try and clear the stinging pain and kept walking normally. It was a whole three and a half minutes until I heard a loud howl and I ducked into some bushes. My breathing was heavy and I was frankly terrified.

I really didn't want to continue because it was very obvious that wolves were nearby. It reminded me of a song that instantly got stuck in my head, which was annoying as all hell because at the moment I was a bit occupied.

In your eyes, there's a heavy blue
One to love and one to lose
Sweet divine, a heavy truth
Water or wine, don't make me choose

I tried to shake it but I just couldn't and I accepted my fate.

I wanna feel the way that we did that summer night, night
Drunk on a feeling alone with the stars in the sky, sky

I hummed along quietly.

I've been running through the jungle
I've been running with the wolves
To get to you, to get to you
I've been down the darkest alleys
Seen the dark side of the moon
To get to you, to get to you

Somehow the song was making me feel more comfortable and confident and I started moving again, holding the torch above my head and humming along quietly as I searched.

I looked for love in every stranger
Took to much to ease the anger
All for you, yeah all for you
I've been running through the jungle
I've been running with the wolves
To get to you, to get to you

"Oh to get to you, ah, ah-a-ah, ah, ah-a-ah, ah, ah-a-ah, oh to get to you." I mumbled it to myself, only really focused on the task at hand, which was to find George.

Your fingertips trace my skin
To places I have never been
Blindly, I am following
Break down these walls and come on in

I wanna feel the way that we did that summer night, night
Drunk on a feeling alone with the stars in the sky, sky

I saw a little den, something that probably belonged to a badger or something. Then I saw a puddle of something, and upon closer inspection it was most definitely throw up. I cringed away from it and saw a bunch of scuffs on the floor, where George mush have fallen, and then a dragging trail in the dirt and leaves that meant he was definitely crawling.

I started to follow until I heard a deep growl and froze. That was a wolf. It must have been a wolf. There was no way that it wasn't a wolf. I took a breath and tried to control my heartbeat. George was out here, I knew that now, and I knew his general direction. I was going to find him before that wolf and I was gonna get him out of there.

He didn't deserve this, what I'd done to him. He didn't deserve to be stuck here in this forest, he didn't deserve to be caught up in the middle of all my mental shit. I kept walking in his direction until I heard a startled shriek and a growl, with a bark following. I sprinted in that direction, I could only assume that the shrieking was from George and he'd been found by whatever wolf was out here.

I ran as fast as my fatigued legs could carry me, and then I saw the two. George was scrambling backwards on his butt and the wolf looked like it was about to pounce. George looked like he was in pain and pure terror was painted on his face. The moment that his eyes registered the light coming from my torch, which took only a split second, his eyes snapped to me and the fear grew.

The wolf jumped and I ran into into its side when it was in midair tackle style, shoving it onto its side and off course from George. The bad thing was that it effectively trained its attention to me. I had just enough time to swallow in fear before it snarled and leaped at me, snapping savagely as it went.

I didn't know what to do so I waved my torch across its eyes and dodged, which at the very least snowblinded it. Then I realized that the thing was flammable because of the smell of singed hair and my ADHD configured a plan. Set it on fire, grab George, run. Simple, right?

The wolf coughed and whimpered, trying to look around. It's nose was possibly the most powerful thing that it had tough and it found me much faster than I anticipated, which threw off my plan a little. It ran at my legs and nearly bowled me over, and I chased after it and lit it on fire, it was surprisingly easy to catch on fire, highly flammable.

It yelped and whimpered and tried to run away, and while hat distraction was on I grabbed George and booked it as fast as possible, torch still in hand. Now don't get me wrong, but George was heavy. I was also carrying him with one arm, but that didn't change his weight.

"Owowowowowow!" George cried out. "My foot, my foot you dumbass my foot!"

"You try carrying a torch and a squirming adult and running from a flaming wolf, it's not easy! Help me out here, will you?" I adjusted his position so that he could lean on me while we ran. He was limping heavily, but it was faster than me trying to do it all alone, even if it looked like it hurt him more with every step he took.

After about ten minutes of part running part speed walking part limping, we made it back to camp. The fish were cold. I sat down on the rock and threw my torch back into the dying fire. I knew where I kept a pile of wood. "Stay here, I'll be right back."

George nodded and looked at me in what I could only describe as awe and shock, which made me blush and just do what I said I would do. I swallowed with sweat under the collar. Taking a deep breath, I got to work and picked up bundles of wood to put in the fire pit.

When I got back, George was asleep and two fish had been eaten. I chuckled to myself and looked at the stars, sitting next to him. I almost lost him again, and it was my fault, again. I ran my fingers through his hair as he slept, which made him smile in his sleep, and in turn made me smile. I looked back at the sky that was shining a pale light on everything, and it faintly reminded me of two days ago, further up in the forest.

The first day at the bridge. The second day was yesterday. I was going to do my best, my top effort, not to turn back.

I softly sang the song that had entered my mind to the stars.