Seventeen [boyxboy] ⚣

Chapter Ten: Zacharius

» Zacharius «

I'm not straight . . .

That's the thing I know for sure. Maybe I'm gay? Or maybe even bisexual. I honestly have no idea. Right now, I don't want to put any labels on myself. I knew I always felt odd because I've never been attracted to anyone else-girls or boys. I have spent my entire life focused on one thing and that is to study well and pursue my dreams in filmmaking.

I'm ninety-nine percent sure that I like Connor though. By a lot. I think ever since I met him I immediately found him interesting.

I guess I could say the same for our situation at the moment as it's very interesting too. It's simple: I kissed him and he kissed me back; I like him and he likes me back. Yet, at the same time, it's also kind of complicated. But it's great . . . so great.

Yeah, I admit that I'm a little bit scared. It's all very overwhelming. I've never even liked anyone, so how do I know for sure that I actually like Connor? What's the deal with the remaining one percent?

My thoughts calmed down for a second as I grabbed a pair of socks inside my locker. I then sat alone on one of the benches to put them on. It's fortunate for me to have my own company right now in this locker room because I picture myself looking as stressed as ever. I don't want anyone to see or ask about it. It's the basketball tryouts wherein Benjamin invited me to audition for, but my head is so not aligned regarding everything that has to do with it at all. It's all Connor.

Yesterday is still clear as ice to me. I can't get it out of my head. After what happened in the bathroom, Connor and I didn't see or talk to each other. The last message we have is me telling him that I liked him back and that's it. He didn't even reply.

Honestly, part of me thinks that one of the reasons why I kissed him in the bathroom is that it was an act of revenge, hoping that he wouldn't get me out of his head either. It'd be unfair if I'm the only one losing my mind over all of it. When he kissed me for the first time, and when I kissed him back; then when it was me who kissed him, and when he kissed me back . . . his lips, the sounds he made and-

I want to scream.
Why hasn't he replied to my messages? It's been a whole day and I haven't heard anything from him. Everything about the kiss and everything about him is just freely playing in my head repeatedly like a good, timeless movie.

My train of thought was interrupted when I heard a couple of boys entering the locker room. With them, Benjamin was laughing and it looked like he was having the time of his life. I focus on tying my shoelaces.

"Dude!" Benjamin blurted as he walked towards me.
"You ready for your audition? Those guys before you were awful as hell. No pressure, of course."

I force a smile, "Yeah, I'll be there in a bit."

With my reply, I expected the conversation to end, but then Benjamin gestured for the other boys to leave. When they did, he harshly tapped his hand on my shoulder as a "friendly move."

"My guys and I saw you actively hanging out with the gay kids over the past couple of days," he began.

I look up at him in confusion, "Gay kids?"

He chuckled, "Connor and Axel. You know who I'm talking about."

"Ah, yes. I do know them. I don't think you should assume what their sexuality is, though," I reply.

Then his smile faded quickly, "Whatever, dude. I'm just trying to warn you. There's been word around that they're both trying to hook up and have a threesome with any person in this school who has a dick. Which means, everyone."

My brows furrow and I let out a huff. I know that's not true.

"Wait, they haven't already recruited you, right? Because you know me, I don't wanna be around any of that gay stuff. That kind of sin."

This guy is just absurd. I continue to ignore his comments.

"I'm joking, bro. Just try to stay away from them, alright?" He said like if I'd follow his orders.
"The other half of the audition is about to start. Come on!" One of the guys said as he entered the locker room in a rush. We hurriedly prepared what needed to be settled and then went outside the room.

~~~~~~~~~~

The audition went well. The coaches and the other guys from the team said that they liked my performance. I won't hear the results until the end of the week, but I'm confident that I got in. I mean, I was the only one who never made a single mistake during the mock games.

Benjamin and his guys who were already on the basketball team weirdly went out early, though. The coach didn't even notice them leave. I'm guessing it's probably for a party that I don't ever want to be invited to.

After the audition, I decided to walk home alone. When I got out, the streets were quiet because it was late afternoon-most people were still either in their schools or work, or they'd already gotten home. I like it, though. It's peaceful. The sky is not very cloudy, and so is my head. It's good.

To make the peace even better, I was about to plug my earphones on and listen to my favorite songs. To make this moment more cinematic. I don't know.

But then my phone buzzes.

It's a text message from Axe, and as soon as I saw the preview in the notifications, my heart skipped a beat.

Oh no.

Where are you?
Connor is in the hospital. Can you come?