Burrying the Past

Chapter 3

Peeta's POV.
"Peeta, get your lazzy ass off the couch and come help me set the table!" Haymitch calls out from downstairs. I set my notebook aside a run downstairs.
"Come on, help me set the table. The Everdeens will be here in 10 minutes."
I laugh at Haymitch who is struggling to set a towel in the long Mahogony table.
"What you laughing at? Do you think you can set the towel better than I can? Why don't you come and give it a try? Huh?" Haymitch says.
I chuckle and roll my eyes, walking towards Haymitch and taking the towel away from him and setting it on the table.
I can't understand how did he manage to survive living here by himself, knowing he doesn't even know how to set a table. How did I even end up here? I mean, why would a man like Haymitch be willing to take care of a troubled teenager? When I was first told that someone was willing to shelter me in his house I first thought it was only because of the monetary support they'd  be given. I had completely lost all my hopes in the humanity, that humans are the real monsters that we check for under the bed when we are small and innocent. I never checked for those monsters, I already knew they weren't there, they were somewhere else. But then Haymitch appeared, received me in his home and took care of me, or better, cared about me.
"And That's how you set a towel." I say, jokingly.
"Oh, I knew that, I was just doing the hard way, ya see?" Haymitch says.
"Whatever." I say rolling my eyes.
There's a knock on the door.
"I'll go open it." I say.
Standing in the door step is Katniss, a woman (who I assume must be her mother) and a blonde smiley girl wearing her hair in two braides.
Katniss looks beautiful wearing the oversized sweater and jeans she was wearing this morning. There's something about her look that makes her look stunning. Not flawless, but the way everything about her works together, makes her look perfect in my eyes.
"Hi, Peeta!" Katniss says.
"Hey." I say, without even being able to stop staring at her.
"Have you met my mother?" She says pointing to the blonde haired woman behind her.
"Nice to meet you, Peeta" she says warmingly, smiling. She looks like an angel compared to my mother.
"Nice to meet you too." I say shaky her hand.
"Hey, don't forget me!" The short girl says.
"Of course, how could I ever forget my Little Duck." Katniss says pinching her cheek.
She crossed her arms and pouts "Whatever" she mumbles.
I chuckle "nice to meet you, Little Duck!" I say.
"You too?" She frowns.
"This is Prim, my little sister." Katniss says.
"Hi, Peeta!" She says.
"Hi! Come on in." I say letting them inside the house and guidons them towards the kitchen.
"Hi, old man!" Katniss says.
"Hello, sweetheart." Haymitch answers. This makes Katniss scowl.
"We decided to bring dinner since I don't think These men can cook." Ms. Everdeen says, lifting a basket.
Haymitch picks at the basket and takes out a muffin from inside.
"Mhh, delicious!" He says.
Katniss slapps his hand. "That's for dessert." she says.
Prim giggles.
"How are you today, girl?" Haymitch asks.
"I'm just fine. How bout you, Mitch?" Prim asks.
Well everyone has nicknames for Haymitch. Maybe I should get him one too. i still find it weird to call him for his first name. My mother always told me not to call adults by his first name. But then again, she also told me not to call her mother.
I shut my eyes. Dizziness takes controll and I start to get lightheaded. I feel hurt always that I think about her, and I can't go back there. Not now, not ever. I slowly count to three before opening my eyes again.
Haymitch is looking at me worriedly while everyone else takes a seat on the table. I give him a reassuringly smile and take a sit besides Katniss. She smiles at me and I smile back.
"So, what is there for dinner?" Haymitch asks.
"Roasted Duck with rice. And muffins for dessert, if you didn't eat everything." Katniss says rolling her eyes.
Haymitch chuckles and pours himself a glass of whine.
We eat the dinner in a peaceful silence, sometimes people asking me questions like how was I liking school and such.
"What happened to your forehead?" Prim suddenly asks. I look at her. Great, everyone seems to notice this stupid scar.
"Nothing, it was just a hit." I say, trying to avoid the subject.
"Peeta has a concussion, deary." Miss Everdeen says, obviously trying to shush Prim.
But apperently she doesn't get the clue, because she keeps talking. "Is that why I always hear you screaming at night?"
I immediatly look at her, my eyebrows furrowing. "What?" I ask, but it comes more as a whisper.
Am I that loud? True, my nightmares are kind of awfull but there's no way I could scream so loud that my neighbours could hear me.
"Sometimes concussions cause people to have nightmares and such." Prim explains innocently.
I stare again at my plate, not feeling like having any sort of visual contact with anyone. For some reason I feel embaressed.
"Prim!" Ms. Everdeen scolds.
"But there's no problem in what I said!" Prim says.
I stop listening to the conversation and just stare looking at my plate. I'm starting to feel dizzy and my head is starting to hurt, as I loose myself in thoughs and memories.
This is the first actual meal I've had in weeks. With Haymitch you always eat in the couch or something. I remember the last meal I had with my family. When I say with family I meant when my dad was still around. That was the last meal I had with him before he walked out on us. It was the usual, everything quiet, sometimes my older brother trying to start a conversation and, in return, recieving glares from my mother. Dinner was usually the time she was the most grumpy. Not violent, just grumpy. That was also when she was the most mean. Everything was usually fine until half the meal as done. Then my dad and mother would start arguing, louder by the minute, that was when I used to get the most scared. That last night before dad left it was the worst. I can't even remember what were they arguing about, I was just seven at the time. I just know that after a while me and my Brothers went to our bedroom and that night we were all so scared that we slept huddled together. In the morning dad wasn't there anymore, and anything was ever the same.
"Peeta? Peeta?"
I look up, coming back to earth. I look around. Katniss has her hand placed on my lap and is looking worriedly at me.
"Huh?" I manage to .say
"Are you okay?" She asks quietly.
I nod. A terrible headache hits me and I just want to lye down and sleep.
I stand up and everyone looks at me.
"I'm going to bed." I mumble.
With that I leave the room and go up the stairs to my bedroom.
I throw myself on the bed. The moment my head hits the pillow I'm out cold.

I wake up to the sound of someone opening the door.
"Hey." Haymitch says quietly.
I don't say anything.
"Are you okay? You left the dinner so suddenly." He asks
"Yeah. I was just feeling a little light-headed." I say.
"Yeah?" Haymitch asks.
"Yeah." I mumble.
Is he drunk or something? Because he isn't making any sense.
Haymitch sits in the corner of my bed.
"What's wrong." he asks.
"Nothing" I insist.
"Okay. " He makes a pause"But what's really wrong?" He asks again. I guess he isn't going to give up.
"It's nothing. It's just that-I don't know."
"You know you can tell me, boy." Haymitch says.
I sight. The truth is that in three weeks this man has been more of a father to me than anyone else in my entire 16 years of life. And I trust him.
"I just feel that I'm not supposed to be here. Or anywhere else. Why do I even live? I'm tired. I'm so tired of the rain in my life is always enough to get my feet wet but never enough to drown me. I mean, I'm trying to start over but the past keeps haunting me, stopping me to get over it, to forget it." I say truthfully.
"You know what? I know how that feels. I also lost a lot during my life. And the past, it's a stalker, you can't just make it disappear. It'll always be there, for more you try to ignore it. But just because the past is there, doesn't mean there can't be a present, a new beginning. And you know what? Sometimes new beginnings are disguised of painfull endings. And before you say you don't know what are you doing here, just remember, there's something for everyone, everything happens for a reason. So don't give up." Haymitch says.
I look at him. I never knew Haymitch would ever say something so... I don't know, right? I think about it for a second, yes, right. He is right, I guess I can't loose hope. Because hope is what keeps us moving, it makes us strong. And I know I have to try, to have hope.
'I'm strong. I can move on.' I tell myself.