Burrying the Past

Chapter 10

Peeta's POV.

Teodore Mellark. Teodore. Ted.
Ted, the same Ted that I haven't spoken to for 5 years now.
The same Ted that one morning was gone, after he had turned 18.

I'm too overwhelmed to even think straight, to have any sort of reaction. The only thing I feel is my mouth going dry, as a rush of memories flood through me.

I know Haymitch and Katniss are expecting me to break down or have some sort of panick attack. But no. I simply focus on breathing, while staring at the white enveloppe I'm holding.
I cautiously place it on the coffe table, as if it was a bomb that could go off any moment destroying everything and everyone I have around me.

"Aren't you going to open it?" Katniss asks cautiously, trying to place my expression.

I nod, while pressing my lips together, while trying to organize the jumble of memories and thoughs.

Both Haymitch and Katniss are staring at me waiting for my reaction, but nothing comes Instead my whole mind goes blank for a second and I do the best thing I could think of, ignore it. Leave the letter there, don't even stare at it. Pretend it doesn't exist, hoping that if I do that, it might actually disappear.

"I'm hungry." I flatly say, heading to the kitchen. Both Haymitch and Katniss trailing behind me. I open the fridge and turn around "Do you want something?" I ask them.

"Hu, no I'm fine." Katniss says, but it comes more like a whisper.

"I'll just have a bottle of scotch." Haymitch says. I immediatly shoot him sagres through the eyes.
Haymitch simply shruggs and leaves the room.

"Peeta-" Katniss starts but I cut her off.

"Are you sure you don't want anything?" I insist.

Katniss sights. "Peeta, quite it!" She says almost angrily. This somehow startles me, I've seen Katniss mad at times, many times actually, mostly because of how stubborn she can be, but it was never anything like this. But I don't let it reach me and take my phone out of my pocket.
"How about pizza?" I ask dialing the number of that pizza place to order some. "What do you want in the pizza?" I ask.

Katniss has her arms crossed, and seems both upset and worried.

"Anything will do." she mumbles.

I nod and order a margheritta with extra cheese, as Katniss likes it.

I go back to the living room and turn on the tv, putting on Cartoon Network, while Katniss follows me and calls my name.

I turn around "What is it?" I ask her.

She keeps a straight face. "Peeta, Maybe we should talk about it." she says so calmly it almost frigthens me.

Of course I know what she is talking about but I just pretend I don't know.
"What are you talking about, Katniss?" I say, as naive as I can be.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about." she says a little more harshly, again, I keep pretending I know nothing.

"Look, Katniss, I don't have time for this, The Flinstones just started and I really want to watch it. Now, will you be the best and watch it with me and wait for the pizza to arrive, or what?" I say neutrally, although a sudden pang of sadness and frighten reached me, as I think of the letter. 'Ignore it, Peeta. There's no letter.' I tell myself.

Katniss sights and gives in "I do love watching cartoons with you and eat pizza." she says sitting down next to me and resting her head on my shoulder.

Soon the pizza comes and I go get it. In I'm back to the living room Katniss is cuddled in a fuzzy blanket. I smile.

"Is there space for me?" I ask, the grin on my face getting wider.

Katniss smiles and pats the sit next to her. I sit and place the pizza in the coffee table, taking out a slice. Katniss does to and we eat the pizza in silence, watching cartoons while cuddling.

When we finish the pizza Katniss turns serious.

"Peeta, I really don't want to push the subject but you can't just ignore it, it won't make the problems go away."

I sight "I guess not."

"Look, I have no idea of what happened in your past and I really don't care. I care about you and all I want is to help you, so don't tube everything of bad around you out. Let me help you." Katniss says truthfully.

I smile "I guess your right. Again." I mumble.

"I always am! So, are you going to open it or what?" Katniss asks.

I look at the letter. Should I? Or not? What could be in there Anyway?
No, I shouldn't. Whatever it is it's part of the past now. I have to let go. It won't make any diference anyway. What is gone is gone, and the life I had before is gone. I have to let go, move on.

I Shake my head "No, I don't want it." I say.

Katniss nods "I understand." she says, kissing my cheek softly.

I cautiously peck her lips, and then kiss her, not being able to stop myself from smiling under the kiss.

Katniss has this effect on me I can't explain. Now that I have her, I know I couldn't live without her. Because now that I saw her face, even sky looks boring to me.

"Why don't we just get read of the letter?" Katniss asks.

"Yeah, I guess it's better." I say. No tentations, I don't wNt to know what's in it.

Both me and Katniss stand up. Katniss picks up the letter. "Do you have a lightning?" She asks.

"In the kitchen." I answer.
We both head to the kitchen and I take the lightning, giving in to Katniss.

Katniss lights it and places it under the letter. The corner starts slowly burning.

I look at it. What could the letter have anyway? What if it was something important, like the reason why Ted left so suddenley. Maybe he wants to apolagize. It must be something even a little important for him to have all this trouble to find my curreny address.
Pictures of my brother flash in mind. Why did he leave without saying good bye? I though he cared, not if only a little. Though I don't balame him for being there. How could I? I do balame myself for thinking he would be there.
My mind is going a mile an hour and I don't even think about my actions.

"STOP!" I yell.

Katniss turns off the lightning and looks questioningly at me. Pnly the tip of the letter is burnt, I could still read it.

I breath in "I want to read it." I say, but it is more of a whisper.

Katniss seems to understand what I say because she hands me the letter. "Here." she simply says, not sounding not even a but surprised about my sudden change of ideas, as of she was already expecting that.

I take the letter, with shaky hands, while trying to understand what I just did. Why do I want this stupid letter? The only thing I know is that I have to open it.

And I do, I open the enveloppe and take out the letter. It looks like a simple card.

I breath in before I start reading it.

I can almost imagine my expression, my moth hanging slightly open and my eyebrows quirked.

"What does it say?" Katniss asks both calmly and curiously.

"He is inviting me to his wedding."