My Beautiful Mess

Chapter 13 - You can't win at everything

Ash smiled at me when I walked through the door but I just ignored it and sat down in silence.

He waved in front of my face and called my name before I snapped at his to leave me alone.

That got him confused.

Half way through the lesson I guess he couldn't hold it in any longer because he hagan talking to me "Cecily what's wrong? You seemed happy this morning and then suddenly you weren't." Ash stated.

"I wonder why." I said sarcastically "I hope you enjoyed laughing at me today while Cassie made a cool out of me."

Ash was about to interrupt but I carried on "Yeah I saw you. So I'm glad you enjoyed the show. Hey, at least I have a new nickname now. Frigid really worlds doesn't it?" I snapped.

I was angry at him for laughing. I didn't expect him to shut her up; he has his oh-so-important image to contain but he could have looked less amused.

"Don't blame this on me Cecily, you could have stood up for yourself!" He snapped back.

"And give her the satisfaction? No thanks!" I frowned.

"It's not about that it's about..." Ash began but I cut him off.

"I've been dealing with it for past two years, not you, me! I know how to do this so stop pretending it's that simple!" I spat.

Ash pulled a disgusted shocked face "Don't act like a know it all. I'm saying..."

"Im not a know it all, Ash!" I yelled.
The teacher have me a pointed look and the class silently laughed. I can't wait to go home.

Later on I was sitting on the roof of the porch decided to message Ash. We were just about becoming friends, and unusually I didn't want to ruin that.

Hey, sorry about today. I sort of exploded. I was just annoyed that you laughed along with everyone else after yesterday...

After about ten minuets of staring up at the sky he replied.

That's okay. Sorry I called you a know it all.

Well at least he said sorry for something. All though he didn't apologise for laughing which was, quite obviously, what's was annoyed about the most. You can't win everything.

* * *

The next morning was one of those mornings where I really didn't want to go to school. I kept waking up last night and my eyes were all swollen and the bags under my eyes were noticeable even under concealer.

"Woah Cissy you look awful! I don't think you should go to school, you look way too tired. Actually I don't think Mum or Dad would be happy about it. Did you sleep?" Harry said.

My head began to pound and I sat down on the sofa and curled up. "Erh Harry that's too many words, my head hurts." I moaned.

I was already in my uniform so I guess could go to school. "Ill try to go to school but could you pick me up if I text you?" I begged. When he agreed he gave me a lift to school.

I felt awful walking into form. I felt like my head was going to explode and I was going to collapse. Keeping my eyes open was a chore. Do you ever get that sensation where you go blind and dizzy at the same time. Every time I moved too fast I felt that.

"Woah, what's up with you?" Ash frowned. I swallowed bile in my throat and tried to ignore the urge to gag as I spoke back to him. "I think I'm going to throw up." I groaned.

His hand went to my arm as he guided me up. Everything went white and blurry as he walked me somewhere. To the nurse I think?

The next thing I knew I was holding some sort of container in my hands and Ash was rubbing my back. I am not going to throw up, i told myself.

I retched once and didn't allow it to happen again. I was not going to go home; people will think I'm trying to escape humiliation.

I really wanted Ash to leave because I really didn't want him to see me like this.

When I felt better I sat up and inhaled. The nurse handed my a drink which I chucked back in seconds and Ash handed me a pice of gum which I happily took and chewed.

"I think I'm okay to go to next lesson." I said confidently. I honestly did feel a bit better. Ash was reluctant or some reason but I wanted to go.

"I can do this." I said to him and he half smiled.

What I didn't know was next lesson in gym we had basketball. With the boys.
My school is very anti-sexist. The believe we should occasionally get both sets together and play a sport as long as there is a mixed, equal share of gender on each side.

I had Max on my team who stood by me, looking ready to sprint me off court to throw up or pass out. Unfortunately Adia was in the opposite team. I realised Ash was on my team but kept a distance, watching almost constantly. I wish everyone would stop being to protective.

I saw him mouth to me 'Don't do anything stupid.' Which made no sense. That was, until the game started.

I saw Cassie on the other team and exuded she was going to down.

Around half way through the game she went to shoot and one of the guys from my team yelled my name and hit the ball in my direction which, of course, hit me on the head and I went down again. I didn't faint luckily but this has happened two time in two days. In front of everyone both me.

Honestly, what kind of sick joke is this?

It's like daja vu! I sat up from the floor, groaning and holding my head. "Why does this always happen to me!" I moaned.

Like last time Adia an Max crowded me but this time I had gained a new member in my audience.

A pair of blue eyes looked at me from above and pulled me up as soon as I said "I feel really ill again."

Max decided that I should go home and Adia and Ash agreed.

To be honest so did I...

A/N

Sorry I haven't wrote for ages so this chapter is twice as long