Beat the devil's tattoo

Chapter XVIII. "Break on through (to the other side)"

 Break on through (to the other side)

It had been a few weeks since that day at the Department of Mystery, Marla and Sirius had moved to Remus' cottage. Marla knew of the place as the werewolf had allowed her to stay there for a while after her brother's murder.

From afar everything seemed to be back to normal. Marla was seemingly back to her normal self and the Order had multiplied missions, hoping to slow Voldemort's plans.

However, everything was not alright. Marla, as much as she tried to hid it, was completely shattered since that day at the ministry. Her relationship with Sirius was fizzling, as were all of her relationships. While she could keep her facade in the presence of others, it was hard to do so in the quietness of Remus' cottage. Sirius was not blind, he saw that Marla was hurting but each of his attempts were vain as Marla detached herself even farther from him.

It was not helping that Dumbledore had not been able to find what curse had been used on her, the wizard had also other things to think about.

He had broke something in her that day and she was slowly turning against herself, no matter how much she denied it. She was unable to sleep, too scared of what could happen and even more scared to sleep next to Sirius. She had took the habit to slip out of bed once he was asleep and take the couch in the living room of the cottage. She was barely talking to him, nevertheless touching him. He couldn't remember the last time they had kissed. Actually he could, it was before that day a the Department of mystery.

Their relationship was slowly breaking and Sirius watched helplessly as Marla destroyed herself. She barely ate, drank more than ever and every time Sirius would catch her, a cigarette was hanging off her mouth.

Marla had no idea of what was happening to her. She felt like something was missing inside of her, like if Voldemort had took a piece of her soul that day and she was desperate to have it back. It started slowly, she wondered if she could get it back, if he could give it back. She didn't realised she thought about him so much until she woke one night on the couch of the cottage screaming his name. Sirius and Remus had rushed into the room, Sirius had known that she wasn't sleeping next to him for a while but did not know what to do.

That night, Marla had dreamt about finding Voldemort, she had walked to him and it was like she was full again. As frightened as she was, she would not share the subject of her dream with the two men, she felt like it was hers. Hers to carry or hers to keep ?

After Harry was dropped at the burrow, in the middle of the summer, Sirius decided to spend time with his godson. He did not know how to get to Marla anymore and as heartbroken as he was, Harry was a good distraction. So, he spent the majority of his days at the Burrow. Remus had left too, Dumbledore had asked him to spend time in the underground with the werewolf community, in hopes of rallying some to their cause.

Marla sat on the porch of the cottage one morning of August. It was still early but Sirius had already gone to the Burrow, the two barely exchanging a word. She watched the smoke of her cigarette in the sky as she thought. She knew Sirius was trying to help, but did she want his help? She was fine. Maybe she should just find Voldemort and ask him to give back what he took. Maybe she could go to him and he would help her, then she could go back to Sirius and her life. She was about to go, deciding to find Voldemort and ask him back what he had took but she was stopped by Sirius apparating outside the wards. He was with Harry, Hermione, Ginny and Ron. The five made their way to her, all walking cautiously as if she was made of glass.

"Hey, we were going to go visit the twins new shop, we thought you might want to join, you know if your feel like it?" Asked Sirius softly.

I was about to do something actually, she thought darkly before realising the horror of her thoughts. So she nodded, hoping that a change of hair would set her head right and telling them she needed to change before meeting them back in the kitchen.