Multiverse Theory is a BITCH (RWBY)

Jaune's Uneventful life

AJ: I'm not even sure how to explain this universe

Pyrrha: What do you mean?

AJ: Jaune kinda just tries to live a normal life but things just keep happening and involving him

Pyrrha and most of the audience looked confused

Jaune was seen waking up from bed and getting himself ready for another day when he went downstairs half asleep to sees Glynda in the kitchen.

Glynda: Hey babe, want anything?

Glynda looked shocked and Pyrrha almost lunged at her.

Nora: PYRRHA CALM DOWN.

Pyrrha stopped struggling and settled with trying to burn a hole in Glynda's head with her glare.

Everyone else moved away from Pyrrha nervously.

Jaune: I could do with some coffee, thanks.

Glynda: Ok by the way, where's the trash?

Jaune: Under the sink.

As this Glynda went about making his coffee and Jaune sat down looking at the table reading news from his scroll he fully woke up.

Jaune: Wait a sec, I DONT HAVE A GIRLFRIEND.

Jaune ran to Glynda? and pulled her wig off to reveal it to be 5 raccoons in a disguise.

Pyrrha seeing this calmed down and immediately grew confused as did everyone else

Weiss: What.

Emerald: What.

Racoons: DRATS, FOILED AGAIN.

The racoons scurry away and Jaune throws the abandoned disguise in the trash and finishes making the coffee.

After finishing his coffee he heads out to his car with wearing small backpack while holding a donut in one hand and his keys in the other and unlocks it, when suddenly a group of people rush towards his car and rob everything inside it.

Blake: Where did they even come from?

Nora: AND WHY DID THEY ROB JAUNE!

Jaune not even looking surprised continues heading to the car when Yang suddenly flies into the car bending it in half.

Yang: JEEZ. What hit me, a truck!?

Jaune then looks down the street where she come from to see the rest of RWBY fighting a mech while Neptune, Sun and PNR fight off waves of Grimm and White Fang.

Yang: Eh, close enough.

Ruby: Oh yeah that, wait weren't we near the docks for that why are we in a neighbourhood?

Jaune stares at the fight before taking a bit of his donut and heads to the library on foot.

As Jaune walks down the street he sidesteps a man walking around nonchalantly while on fire and sees an Atlaesian soldier talking to Qrow who is entirely in the nude standing there.

Winter: What!?

Ruby and Yang: EW!!!

Qrow: Why am I naked?!

Ironwood: Better question why are you naked and confronting one of my soldiers?!

Jaune blinks and suddenly the soldier is on the ground seemingly unconscious as Qrow walks away.

Mercury immediately lost his shit at that while Ironwood seethed at one o his soldiers getting taken out like that.

Yang: Guess that he was taken out in the blin-.

Weiss froze her mouth shut again.

Jaune, finally in the library sits down at one of the tables to read and pulls out his headphones to listen to music and as he is reading Ironwood crashes through one of the walls behind him, Jaune however doesn't even realize as he is still wearing his headphones.

Ironwood: What is even happening anymore?

 Ironwood stands up and sees Hazel and Port come though the hole in the wall grappling each other he grabs one of the tables and throws it at Hazel which for some reason causes an explosion that pulls everything in the room towards it including the table Jaune is sitting at.

Penny: What amount of explosive force could have caused that?

Ironwood then lets out a warcry and runs at the two before being kicked through another wall by Hazel who followed him out with Port chasing the two.

Jaune looks behind him and sees the destruction and sighs before standing up and leaving to head to the nearby coffee shop.

Weiss: Why is he being so nonchalant about everything!?

On his way there he sees the road is packed with a battalion of Atlesian soldiers all nervously aiming there guns at Qrow, who is still nude staring back at them.

Winter: Again?!

Qrow: Why am I still naked?

Nora: Why are they so nervous?

 When Qrow takes a step forward they all take a step back and Jaune doesn't even bother continuing to watch as this is the 7th time this has happened and Qrow always seems to win.

Glynda: This has happened seven times!?

Ozpin: We need to talk about your alcohol problem.

AJ: I'm not even sure he's drunk.

Everyone stared at AJ before staring at Qrow.

Qrow: I HAVEN'T EVEN DONE THAT.

Jaune finally at the café sits down with his order and is about to drink his coffee when two of Junior's men kick the door off its hinges yelling for everyone to empty their pockets only to be met with everyone pointing their guns at the them even an old lady who pulls a rocket launcher out of her purse.

Yang: Oh its those guys.

Glynda: "Those guys"? You've met them before?

Yang: Well...I trashed their nightclub? 

Glynda glared at her and shook her head.

Glynda: We'll talk about this later.

Yang gulped.

Penny: Are we going to ignore that everyone their was armed including the old woman with a rocket launcher?

Winter: Yes. I'm speaking for everyone when i say this isnt event that crazy compared with the rest.

They stop and say "Understandable" before lifting the door back onto the hinges and leave. Everyone else puts their weapons away and continue their conversations.

Jaune finishes his drink and heads home to sleep before seeing Cinder in his bed.

Cinder: WHA-!?

Cinder: Hey there Jaune, care to join me?~

Jaune for once smiles and picks her up in a bridal carry.

Pyrrha immediately had an aura of pure rage while Nora got ready to hold her down.

Cinder: Oh~? How romantic of you Jaune~.

Jaune: Do you know the meaning of defenestrate?

Penny: Is he about to-?

Cinder looks confused but allows him to continue.

Cinder: No?

Jaune: This.

Jaune throws her through the window and goes back to his bed and falls asleep.

Pyrrha instantly shifted to an aura of happiness allowing Nora to relax whereas everyone else burst into laughter while Cinder screamed obscenities at the screen.