Trigger warning: Cursing
Also Tommy thinks that Techno, Phil, and Wilbur's names are Techie, Pill, and Waller
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Like I said before, what he did was too kind to be true. It's not good to trust those who aren't who they say they are
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Tommy's point of view*
These guys are weird. I mean they're cool and all, the Techie guy is my absolute favorite, but the other ones are meh
For example, their names are Waller and Pill. Who has those stupid fucking names!?
But the purple haired guy is funny and warm, I like him! He also protects me from the other two. Red and white stripes is looking very sus to me
And for some reason I'm acting like a fucking child around these people. I'm a big ass man, I should be getting my bitches right now!
But the purple bitch is being so nice and he even growled at the angle! Wait, no. Angel. Tubbo, although I love him like a brother, is a terrible teacher because 1. he has dyslexia. 4. He's really bad at teaching 7. It's hard to learn at age 12
He said there was an Alfalfa, or some other shit, that has letters to make up everything. Aren't letters the things you put papers in to send them?
Also things that are practically the same words confuse me.
I should probably ask them so that I can at least get something from this
"Techieeeee" Techie looked at me and said "Yeah?" "What is the difference between a prostitute and a prosecutor? I've heard people say them before but I don't know what they mean"
I was met with silence and he just looked at me for a long until his face turned red
"P-pill....you tell him" The red and white hat man widened his eyes and back away while saying "Hell no! He's too young to know what it is"
"Yeah but you're the adult!" "YOU'RE TWENTY ONE!" "SHUT IT OLD MAN" "YOU'RE GROUNDED PIGLET" "FUCK YOU GREEN AND WHITE STRIPS."
"The hell? It's red and white you dumbass. Green is the color of a strawberry" I know this! Tubbo had grabbed a strawberry and pointed to it then said 'This is green, this is red.' So the leaf was the color red and the body was the color green!
I'm so fucking smart
Fucking fancy schmancy, being the overdramatic bitch he is, just happened to wake up right before I said it "Are you stupid or some shit? First you can't get our fucking names right and now it's colors"
I take a deep breath and calmly walk over to him with a big big big fake smile
Wilbur's point of view*
The kid walked to me with the fakest smile I have ever seen, and I've seen Techno's smile, and said
"Well, prick, I just want to say that you and your ugly bitch ass personality can go ahead and say fuck off to me because I'm kicking you out of your own fucking shitty ass piece of shit house that is almost uglier than your receding hair that's bigger than your fucking big ass ego that you will never be able to fucking control because you are a motherfucker that can't deal with someone better than you because you are a stupid fucking dumbass who was manipulated and broken from the e girls you tried to date and gave all of your money to and now you have trust issues so you can't trust me being better friends with Techie than you've ever been and a Salmon named...Sally was a stupid and dumb fish who left you with Fundy who's the best and worst thing thst had happened to your life so why don't you just shut the fuck up and let me be"
"AHHHH HE KNOWS THEIR NAMES! HE KNOWS THEIR FUCKING NAMES!" The child tilted his head and said "Whaaaat? I just said random names that popped up into my head. Oh, right, my friends are being controlled by a red cock"
I almost choked because of this. Why did he think of that right now!?
"What did you say that made it bleep out?" Pffft
Techno can't even hear the word cock
"Um well what do you mean by that Toms?" "I mean that he left a note saying 'There is a big big egg with red testicles' I have it in my pocket if you would like to see it" He pulls out a post it note and gives it to Phil
"Mate, it says tentacles. Not the other word" "....what's a tentacle?" He's a fucking id-
Before I could finish my thought, Techno started glaring at me
Creepy
"Well it's something that a squid or an octopus has" "...An octopussy?" "NO!" It seems like Techno heard that one
"You know what, just leave it be Techno. Someone else can explain to him what it is"
"But Waller! I wanna know! And I know Pill won't tell me cause he's an old forgetful man"
Dammit. Techno is glaring at me again. Phil can't do shit or else he'll die
Why is this kid getting more love than me!? I've been Techno's brother for all of our life! Sure he was gone for four years inside a little egg that I had to take care of but I was still taking care of my little brother!
Wait...HAH I'M THE FUCKING OLDEST! AND THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN DRINK ALC....
Oh shit
Techno committed crimes. He's bought alcohol before and since he's like seventeen he bought and drank way before he should have
Tsk tsk tsk
Wait
Why is the gremlin looking at me?
And why is he walking towards me?
OH MY GOD HE IS HUGGING ME!
SHIT
"GET HIM OFF OF ME YOU ASSHOLES!!"
Tommy instead jumps on me and digs his face into my shoulder "Walle...you feel like Shroud when...when I hug him. Like a..a teddy bear!" He yawns and his grips gets tighter until I hear snoring
He's about to fall but I put my arms on his back. No no no no
Why do I have to fall for this shit!? First Techno then Phil and now I'm being hypnotized by this kid! He's going to make an amazing hero. Though he'll most likely have to show his face for it to work
I hate him
YOU ARE READING
"That's too kind to do for it to be true" - SBI hero Au/bystanderinnit
Hayran KurguTommy was walking to his delightful pastry shop and saw a fight between a hero and a villain. He was about to walk away but then he saw a stroller next to the villain How did he see this when it's midnight and there are barely any lights? Because th...
