"That's too kind to do for it to be true" - SBI hero Au/bystanderinnit

13."Wait...you're a type of bird hybrid too?" "Caw caw motherfucker?"

Hello! I unpublished this chapter and then republished it because I had moved a part from chapter 14 to this one because I realized that I could've just moved some of that to here and it would have been easy

So please reread this!

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His language...colorful, to say the least

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Phil's point of view*

Do I really have to deal with a child that will curse this mu-

Nope.

No adopting.

I already made a bet with Techno and I can't lose a thousand dollars

I still can't believe that I was stupid enough to bet a grand that I wouldn't adopt another child for a year just because I wanted to prove to him that I'm not a stalker who wants to be around children

And I'm not

I swear on my wings that I am not a pedophile and that Techno is completely wrong whenever he says I am

The blonde boy suddenly stood on the couch he was on and jumped on my back and I screamed when he grabbed some feathers and pulled them out with all his might

Wilbur grabbed him and pushed Tommy down and said, more like yelled, while flailing his arms around "What. The. FUCK!?" Tommy flinched and curled into a ball. It looked like he was scared and it made my heart hurt

When I got out of whatever that trance was my eyes widened at his actions "Wilbur, leave him alone. He didn't kn-" 

Wilbur wasn't having it and snapped back at me "No! He hurt you and needs to understand that if he does it again then he won't stay here! You need to stop being so lenient with everything" He said and huffed when Techno

"Hey, buddy, if you tell me why you did it then I won't be mad" I said while glaring at Wilbur and basically telling him that this was all his fault. His angry look soon turned soft when he saw Tommy slowly uncurl from his ball with tears threatening to spill

"I-I'm sorry..." Not even a split second later his entire demeanor changed and the tears were gone. It's as if he's done this before

"To no one, bitch! I was just minding my own goddamn business until all of a sudden I got here and see fluffy fur over here with his stupid pure white fuzzy things! I got mad because bad people try to steal my red fuzzy things so you must have succeeded with an an....an...angle? No....angel! Yeah, Tubbo says that I look like one for some reason"

I get it now. He's a bird hybrid and knows that our kind are going extinct

"Wait...you're a type of bird hybrid too?" He cocked his head to the side and said "Caw caw motherfucker?"

What type of answer was that. No one that I know of ever look confused while saying that word so why did he

Wait, did he go 'caw caw'? That's kind of adorable...

"Dad, what's going on? I thought you said that bird hybrids were going extinct. How would two fucking bird hybrids just happen to be in the same fucking town the other one just happens to have a poweful enough ability to have us take him in to get training with Siren, Blade, and Inconspicious"

Huh...I guess he's right, it's too much of a coincidence for him to have not planned it

Tommy looked at Wilbur with confusion and said "What the fuck? Incons- inconsispos..no...incosisus...incospisous! I got it! It's incospisous, right?"

I smile at his adorableness and say "Of course it is" He's too cute to say no so how could I just demolish his dream

"Weird name, right? But I guess it's because they couldn't find another name that starts with an I so that they can make it SBI"

Tommy tilted his head in confusion

He looks like he's about to say something really stupid

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Number of words: 666