Soon You'll Get Better

32.

32.

The Talk

-⁛-

Silena POV

I heard their entire conversation. I knew what Percy was going to say before he even said it.

And when he did, I knew he would regret it. I knew he would try to deny it. I knew he would pretend he didn't. But I knew that was what he really wanted.

He wanted a break from life. He needed a break from relationships. It was becoming too much for him.

I know that he was struggling to keep himself together without actually saying it.

I know that he was feeling worse than he actually let out.

I know that he wanted the cancer to be gone.

I know that he wanted to swim again.

I know he wanted so many things that he deserved.

But at the end of the day?

He knew it was never going to happen.

Ever since the scan, he was feeling more depressed. Percy was never sad. He never mentioned it once. He was always teasing and laughing.

But now it seemed like he wanted to give up. Wanted to just leave.

And I knew that my little pep talks could only help so much.

"I think we need to take a break," Percy's voice said.

Annabeth was silent. "What?" she asked, after a few minutes.

"I think we need to take a break," he repeated.

"Why?" Annabeth asked.

He was silent for a minute. And then he said, "I need a break."

"A break from what? Me?"

"No," he said in a quiet voice. "From everything. And being with you takes that away from me."

They were quiet for a few minutes.

"Was it me?" Annabeth asked. "I'm really sorry, Percy, I-."

"Stop," he interrupted. "It's not you, Annabeth. Although I would have appreciated an actual conversation other than an attack."

"Then what is it?" Annabeth pressed.

I heard Percy sigh. "It's nothing you need to worry about. I'm just dealing with some stuff."

"Then let me help you."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

They were silent for a minute and when Percy spoke, his voice cracked and my heart broke. "Because no one can help me."

"I can," Annabeth promised. "Just tell me."

"You can't."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm not ready for you to know."

Annabeth sighed. "We can't keep going on like this. If I'm your girlfriend then you have to trust me." 

"That's the problem, isn't it, Annabeth?" Percy asked. "I can't. And that's why I want a break." 

"Percy-" 

"No. Don't pretend like everything's so simple and when I finally tell you, everything will be alright. Well, trust me. It's not! Nothing in life is simple!"