TWINS || All Of Us Are Dead

To On-jo

After arriving at the camp, On-jo had avoided everyone, everyone but Nam-ra. She knows that somehow, Nam-ra knows what she is feeling right now, having lost their Hwang partner. She told Hyun-jin that she will take care of Hye-ji, but she failed. So, she is looking after Nam-ra right now. Because she believes that that is what the twins would've liked her to do.

Sure, the twins would've liked that, but the fact that she is pushing everyone away besides Nam-ra is different. Pushing everyone away and suffering alone will not lessen the pain that she is feeling right now.

She never lost hope though. She still believes that Hye-ji is out there, safe. She believes Hyun-jin is still alive. Which is why even though no one is touching the foods she kept on leaving by the tree, she still continued going there.

'If Hye-ji is alive, then it's not bad to assume that Hyun-jin still is, right? But if he is, then he would've been there at the rooftop too, knowing that he will never let Hye-ji go somewhere alone. Is it really the time to give up? Or should I still hang on a little longer? Maybe I should hang on...but for Hye-ji this time. Maybe I should stop making myself believe that Hyun-jin is still alive even though I watched the construction site blow up myself.'

After seeing Hye-ji today, a part of her is happy, knowing that Hye-ji is safe. But a part of her is in pain, knowing that Hyun-jin wasn't with her. But she always thinks that if she is hurt by the fact that Hyun-jin is gone, how much more does Hye-ji hurt? Especially now that she is alone out there.

She inhaled deeply before opening up the envelope. She didn't want to read it, to be honest. She didn't want to face the fact that Hye-ji, one of her best friend, is out there, alone. And their only means of communication is through a letter, and she can't even reply to Hye-ji. She's not even sure if they will ever see each other again.

'To On-jo-ah <3

Annyeong, On-jo-ah!! How have you been? I know you're not doing well. But I do know that you are trying, and that's what matters. I hope this doesn't come out as creepy, but I know you have been leaving foods out here, with my Nam-ra. You don't have to do it. I'm fine here.

I hope you are not blaming yourself for anything. And I know you, you will try to push people away, but Jo-ah, don't do that. It will only hurt you more if you will do that. And stop right there! I know you think that you deserve the pain, but no, no one deserves to be in pain. So let them. Let our friends help you. Don't push them away, Do you understand?

Anyway, I still haven't found any trace of Hyun-jin. I'm trying. I have been searching for him, but there really aren't anything. I'm scared, Jo-ah. I don't want to accept the fact that Hyun-jin really left me, he really left us. I don't think I should be telling you this, but you deserve to know. 

I want to say sorry, too. For what I did that day. I almost killed you. I'm sorry. Hyun-jin,, before he left, he told me to take care of you. It was his voice, it was him that woke me up from trying to kill you. Even though he is not with us anymore, I know that he loves you so much. And I do too, I love you, my best friend.

Please take care of yourself Jo-ah, I can't lose you too. I may not be with you guys right now, but know that you guys will always be in my heart and mind. I won't promise that I will come back, but I will try my best. And right now, I need to be here outside.

Remember, YOU ARE NOT ALONE NAM ON-JO! You will always have your friends there. Cheong-san, and I hope Nam-ra too. You don't have to suffer alone. Okay?

I hope to see you again, soon.

Love,

Hye-ji <3

Hye-ji is right, she always is. On-jo is not alone, she never was. But she was pushing everyone away, even Cheong-san. She felt like she lost everyone. She had let go of I-sak's hand. She saw Joon-young die. She watched her father die right in front of her eyes. She left Hyun-jin at the construction site. And she had let Hye-ji run away.

She was there. Every single time she lost someone important to her, she was just right there. And she wasn't able to do anything. She blames herself. She could've done better. And Hye-ji knows this, she had been friends with On-jo long enough for her to know that On-jo will blame herself for these kind of things.

To be honest, after reading the letter that Hye-ji wrote, On-jo felt lighter. Hye-ji made her realize that being alone isn't the answer. They all need each other.

'Thank you, Hye-ji-ah. But I really miss you, so please, come back. You and Hyun-jin...please...'