Kyu-Author: Note, This takes places during or right at the beginning of the The Sapphire And Ruby Wedding/Diamond Right Scene. so keep that in mind please, And Also The Fight Is Way More Exaggerated Than Usual So Also Keep That In Mind. Also When Yelling Loudly Bold Letters Will Appear.
(Onwards Crystalline Idiots!)
*As we see our main protagonists in a large crater just above the Universe residence, they notice no scars or even dirt or grime on them. Almost being polished like the day they were born.*
Geth:Um, Why exactly are we clean and have no scars?
Vorinclex:I call Bullshit on that statement. No fucking way we are polished and not dirty. That can't be possible.
Jin-Gitaxias:Well Vorinclex, speak for your fucking self, we are clean and polished. And I Just Realized, My Fucking Pants Are Glittery!
Urabrask:Pants. Pants Are What Your Excited About? You Know What? I'm Not Gonna Say Anything Else.
Geth:Good. Now Lets Get The Fuck Outta Here.
Other Praetors:Agreed.
*As They Start To Step Out If The Crater, Jin-Gitaxias Glimpses A Fight Or A Conflict Happening Straight Within A Good Distance Away From The Others.*
Jin-Gitaxias:Hey Boys, I Think We Might Have A Situation On Our Hands.
Vorinclex:What Fucking Situation? It's Just A Sunny day And A Gay Weddin-Wait GAY WEDDING?!
Urabrask:Wait Wha Wha Wait- Gay Wedding? Where? I Don't See A Wedding, Let Alone People.
Jin-Gitaxias:Right Over There. *Points To The Edge Of The Beach* That's Where The Gay Wedding Is At.
Geth:Well Thanks For Pointing That Out I Guess.
Jin-Gitaxias: Hey No Problem At All.
As They Slide Out If The Beach, They Híde Behind A Large Stone. That Immediately Gets Slashed Into A Baby Piece By Bismuth. Revealing Themselves.
Praetors:Daw Shit. Our Cover Just Had To Be Blown.
*As The Crystal Gems Armor And Weaponize Themselves Along With Steven And Connie, The Praetors Start To Speak In A Oddly Unionized Way.*
Praetors:We Speak Of No ill intentions And Mean No Harm, If You Would Let Us Introduce Ourselves Then You Could Maybe Lower You Arms.
Crystal Gems, Bismuth, Steven And Connie: Fine But Just WHAT Are Who Are You?
Jin-Gitaxias:i am Jin-Gitaxias. Praetor of blue mana.
Urabrask: I Am Urabrask. Praetor Of Red Mana.
Vorinclex:I Am Vorinclex. Praetor Of Green Mana.
Geth:And Lastly, I Am Geth. Praetor To Be Of Black Mana.
Garnet:I Am Garnet.
Pearl:I'm Pearl.
Amethyst:Hey. I'm Amethyst.
Steven:And I'm Steven.
Connie:And I'm Just Connie.
Bismuth:I'm Bismuth Here.
Peridot:And I Am Peridot Metallic Creatures!
Praetors:Thank You. And it is a pleasure to meet you all, Aside From The Triangular One There.
*As They Stop Talking They Are Pushed Back By A Wave If Air. For The Diamonds Have Arrived.*
???:Pitiful. Is This All They Have For A Damn "Defense"?
???:Afraid You Are Correct. But This Will Be Fun Smashing The Life Out Of This Disgraceful Irritating Useless Sloshball Of Trash.
Vorinclex:Hey Fuck Off! Earth Is A Beautiful Home And just Because Petty Bitch 1 and Bitch 2 Throw Themselves A Pissy Fit Doesn't Mean You Destroy Worlds!
Jin-Gitaxias:Damn. That Was Riveting. Now I Wanna Start A Revolution Dammit.
Urabrask:Same Here.
???: *In a extremely Heightened Tone If Voice* QUIET DISGUSTING FLESHY LIFE FORMS! YOU SHALL NOT EVER SPEAK TO A HIGHER AND MORE REGAL BEING THAN ALL OF YOU. AND IF YOU DARE SPEAK TO ME IN THAT WAY AGAIN, I SHALL WIPE YOU OFF OF THIS PITIFUL SOLAR SYSTEM. IS. THAT. CLEAR. YOU, DISGUSTING. ABSOLUTELY MENTALLY DEFICIENT. MEAT-BAGS. IS. THAT. CLEAR?!
Jin-Gitaxias: *Also Screaming Loudly In A Higher Level* HEY YOU! YELLOW CRYSTAL HOE! NO ONE AND I MEAN NO ONE TALKS TO MY BROTHER IN THAT TONE OF FUCKING VOICE! NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I SAW INTO PIECES AND FEED YOU TO A FUCKING GRINDER! IS. THAT. CLEAR. MA'AM OR SHOULD I SAY, BITCH?
Steven And Connie:That Might Have Been A Bad Idea.
Vorinclex & Jin-Gitaxias:Why? She's Just A Useless Tyrant.
Connie & Steven:Those Are The DIAMONDS You insulted.
Praetors: Who? And Why The Fuck Should We Care?
Diamond's:SILENCE, PITIFUL MORTALS!
*As Vorinclex And Urabrask Increase In Volume And Size, A Battle Is Boutta Go Down....Or Is It Something Bigger More Scary More, Disheartening Then This?*
Kyu-Author:TUNE IN NEXT TIME TO FIND OUT! Peace!
YOU ARE READING
Phyrexia; Praetor Reach
HumorSo....You Know The Praetors Right? Vorinclex, Jin-Gitaxias, Urabrask, And Geth Yeah? So What Happens When They Travel Through Universes And Do The Stupidest Bullshit Imaginable? Well, You Get This Book. Have Fun! And Also, Comment Your Criticism So...
