And Then You

17 / maureen

SHE'S so mad she can't even cry.

So he did all of that...all of that...to get her in bed. Again.

Akala niya hindi siya gano'n. Baka nga hindi and this is just her emotions talking.

But just when he proved that he could have her any way he wants her, he leaves.

Siguro wala siyang masyadong pride, pero alam ni Maureen when she's not wanted anymore. She was thrown away already by a man she loved with all her—with all her, so what's one more?

Ito siguro nakukuha niya for hoping.

Kuya Inggo deserves love, pero mayro'n talagang mga tao who don't want it no matter how desperately and genuinely you give it to them.

It's clear he doesn't want hers.

Maureen can't blame him. She won't. Kasalanan niya 'to.

Alam kong uto-uto ako, alam ko na marupok, tao lang din naman kasi ako, kanta ng angel sadly in her head.

May nararamdaman din ako, 'di kasi manhid na tulad mo, alam kong sanay bumitaw ang isang tulad mo, lalayo na ba ako? tuloy niya pa, feel na feel.

OO, PUTANGINA! 'DI NIYA TAYO DESERVE! sigaw ng demonyo. Ngayon lang nagalit, ngayon lang wala sa side ni Kuya Inggo.

So, ayun nga ang ginawa niya.

Maureen doesn't text him. She goes to school with a smile, listening to lectures, taking down notes, like her scalp and neck doesn't hurt, like her skin isn't littered with his bites and marks, like she can't feel him anymore between her legs.

Ilang weeks siyang gano'n. Hindi niya nakita si Kuya Inggo anywhere, at hindi niya rin hinanap.

Hindi rin siya hinanap.

Pag-uwi niya, Maureen kicks off her shoes, tosses her bag on the couch, and marches to her room.

Angrily, she tells Canton, Dangler, Karli, and Piglet, "Divorced na kami ng tatay n'yo, bawal n'yo siyang i-miss. Walang magmi-miss sa kanya, okay? Bawal."

Then she closes the door, strips off her clothes, and takes a shower.

Dito...dito siya maglalabas ng galit niya kasi 'di nya nafe-feel ang tears niya.

Normal ba sex muna bago label? Hindi. Tanga-tanga kasi 'tong si Maureen.

'Wag mong isipin na may kasama siyang iba, sabi ng demonyo niya. Wow, turning over a new leaf na ba 'to? Wala na sa Inggo de Paz fanclub? Oo, meron, pero 'wag mo na lang isipin.

Gagi, ang galing natin pumikit porke't pogi yung red flag, 'no? sabi ng angel.

Bakit lalaki lagi sumasabit sa jeep? tanong pabalik ng demonyo. E ang bilis nila bumitaw. Pero isang hi lang from Kuya Inggo, i-resched na natin self-love natin, Mau.

Mag-flag ceremony ang mga marurupok at tanga, sabi ng angel with a sigh. Tapos leader ka, Mau.

Meeting na lang. Shoutout sa mga pampalipas-oras.

Napasigaw na lang si Maureen when there are loud knocks on the door. "Mau!" sigaw ng boses ni Kuya Migo. "Nalulunod ka na ba diyan? Ang tagal mo!"

Iniiyakan ko best friend mo, sandale lang! gusto niya isigaw, pero ang sabi na lang niya is, "Ito na, I'm done! Why didn't you text me na you were coming?!"

"I did!" sigaw ni Kuya Migo, his voice moving away from the door. "Baka isda ka na diyan, kanina ka pa, e!"

Maureen rolls her sore eyes and gets out of the shower, pero she's also happy her kuya visited. Ang busy niya talaga with acads and Ate Jiya at naiintindihan naman ni Maureen 'yon, pero maghahanap at maghahanap talaga si Kuya Migo ng oras para sa kanya.