DSMP Incorrect Quotes

Bench Trio

Tubbo: I trust Tommy.
Ranboo: You think they know what they're doing?
Tubbo: I wouldn't go that far

The squad is trying to con some random guy
Tubbo: Um, Tommy, why are you pretending I'm this guy's family?
Tommy: We need money!
Tubbo: You're scamming him?
Tommy: I was thinking more like flat-out stealing from him?
Tubbo: What?! No way!
Tommy: Why not? We already stole Ranboo!
Ranboo: Hey guys
Tubbo: No, we didn't. Ranboo can think and talk for themself, they can do whatever they want!
Ranboo: I wanna steal

Store Worker: Would a Mx. Tubbo please come to the front desk?
Tubbo, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?
Store Worker: points to Tommy and Ranboo
Store Worker: I believe they belong to you?
Tommy and Ranboo, simultaneously: We got lost :(
Tubbo: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me-

Ranboo: Tubbo and I don’t use pet names.
Tommy: I see. Hey, what do bees make?
Ranboo: Honey?
Tubbo: Yes, dear?
Ranboo:
Tommy: Don't ever lie to my face again

Tubbo: What if I press the brake and gas at the same time?
Tommy: The car takes a screenshot.
Ranboo: For the last time, get the fuck out

Tommy: I know you snuck out last night, Tubbo.
Ranboo: Play dumb!
Tubbo: Who's Tubbo?
Ranboo: NOT THAT DUMB!!!

Tubbo: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me
Tommy: Okay, but in my defense, Ranboo bet me 50 cents I couldn’t drink all that shampoo.
Tubbo: That’s not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!

Tubbo, texting Tommy: Tommy! Help I’m being kidnapped
Ranboo: Where are you?
Tubbo: I’m with some strange person. In a car. Help.
Tommy: I’ll call Ranboo.
Ranboo, answering their cell: Y’ello?
Tommy: Where’s Tubbo? They texted me that they were being kidnapped.
Ranboo: Tubbo? Whaddya mean, they're right next to me-
Ranboo:
Ranboo: I’ll call you back. *hangs up*
Ranboo: THE NEW HAIRCUT ISN’T THAT BAD!
Tubbo: WHO ARE YOU?!

*The group is getting into the car*
Tubbo: I’m driving.
Tommy, out of view: Shotgun!
Ranboo, turning to face Tommy: Aww! But you had it on the way here-
Everyone except Tommy: WOAH-
Tommy, holding a shotgun: No! I found a shotgun! And I want the front seat! *Pumps gun*

Tommy: I really like this whole ‘good guy, bad guy’ thing you guys have going on.
Tubbo: It’s not an act, it’s just that I’m mean and Ranboo isn’t

Tommy: Hey Tubbo,
Tubbo: Yes?
Tommy: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it’s on?
Tubbo:
Tubbo: Where’s Ranboo?

Tubbo: What's a word thats a mix between 'sad' and 'mad'?
Tommy: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated-
Ranboo: Smad.

Tubbo: Ranboo and I are having a baby.
Tommy: That's gre-
Tubbo, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's you, sign here.

A/n hello! I hope you're doing well! This is all platonic of course just to get that out there!  501 words! Bye! Have a good night/day!