(Yes that title was on purpose, again sorry if I use ant incorrect quotes more than once! I have the memory of a salmon ;))
Wilbur: You think I really give a f*ck? I can’t even read
Wilbur: So apparently the 'bad vibes' I’ve been feeling are actually severe psychological distress
Wilbur: Okay okay stop asking me if I'm straight, gay, bi, whatever. I identify as a F*CKING THREAT
Wilbur, motioning to a Halloween display: All these ghosts! All these ghosts! I still can’t find a boo
Wilbur, threatening the others with a paintball gun: Listen... Life comes at us fast. We don't know what life is gonna give us... And today, it's gonna give you... a paintball!
Wilbur: You’ll have a hard time believing this because it never happens, but I made a mistake
Wilbur: If you can’t beat them, dress better than them
Wilbur: You know how I roll.
Wilbur: And I’m not talking about that time I fell into a pile of dung at the foot of a hill
Wilbur: I was born for politics. I have great hair and I love lying
Wilbur: You can de-escalate any situation by simply saying, 'Are we about to kiss?'
Wilbur: Doesn't work for getting out of speeding tickets, by the way
Wilbur: What doesn't kill me should run, because now I'm f*cking pissed
Wilbur: I’ve come to a point in my life where I need a stronger word than f*ck
Wilbur: If I'm extra sarcastic with you it probably means I'm flirting with you or you really annoy me and I can't handle your crap... have fun figuring out which one
Wilbur: I think my guardian angel drinks
Wilbur: Yeah, I'll smoke a joint tonight, but let's not get too crazy.
*The gang proceeds to get arrested for blocking the road in large traffic cone costumes*
Hairdresser: How would you like your hair cut?
Wilbur: Preferably with scissors, but a sword could be bada$$
Wilbur: So according to the cease and desist order I got, apparently you can't 'legally' be a lawyer if your license is 'cut out of a cereal box'.
Shapeshifter: *transforms to look like Wilbur*
Wilbur: Okay, are you like BLIND? You look nothing like me.First off, I'm way taller. Secondly, I DO NOT look so sleep deprived and lastly, if you could drag comb through that hair you're like a 7 on a good day and I've been told I'm a constant 10.
Wilbur: Schrödinger's cat is overrated. If you wanna see something that's both dead and alive you can talk to me any time of the day.
(Have a nice day/night!! RIP Technoblade, I hope he is kicking whatever supernatural thing's butt up there ❤️🎗🐷)
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DSMP Incorrect Quotes
Humorjust a bunch of incorrect quotes :) Edit: I've quit this fandom but read it if you want, it started as a joke and ended as one so don't take any of this super seriously lol 2024 edit - Please be careful reading this, it was made two years ago and so...
