^william afton x reader ^

8- missing

chapter told from Y/N's perspective

some story elements inspired by LeminJuc

WARNING: really hard angst, I'll make sure to separate the angst from the more fluffy part for the emotionally sensitive readers

after dinner, William and I exchanged numbers before he left, and I and Marie went to our rooms, I lay there in my bed thinking about the kiss...

---------major angst scene begins-----------

I hear the screams. I hear the rain. I hear the water. 

I feel my heart racing. I feel the tears rushing from my eyes. I feel the fear set in.

I screamed out for him, I reached out my arm trying to grab him but the water made him slip away, I watched him floating down the river. I fall to my knees screaming, he's gone... my baby is gone... I feel the pain tearing open my heart as I scream out his name 'LAWRENCE"

then I woke up

I shot up in bed crying, I looked at the clock, 1 pm, great... I slept through my alarms. on my first day of work no fucking less. I screamed   "GODDAMNIT" I grabbed my phone and looked to see a few concerned messages from William along the lines of where are you and did something happen, I called him, the line rang for a few moments before he picked up "ah, Y/N are you alright? Marie said you were having trouble this morning so she didn't wake you up for work" oh okay "yeah, I think I'm sick, I'm sorry to fail on my first day but I really can't go to work right now I feel awful" I partially lied, I mean I felt awful and couldn't go to work, but I wasn't physically sick... "ah I see... well I hope you get better Y/N, i-" I hung up

. I said what I needed to and he heard what I said. I don't wanna talk to people any more than I have to today. I immediately broke into tears, I can't believe my mind would be so cruel to make me relive that. I sighed and walked over to my dresser, I kept on my pyjamas but instead, I reached the bottom of my dresser and grabbed a photo, a photo of Lawrence... the memories flooded back as I remembered that day... the day I lost my child.

he has my smile, except mine lights up the room, and his smile lit up the world...

I fell to my knees as I cried, when suddenly I felt a pain in my leg, I look down... shit.

I got up and went to the bathroom, frantically checking the medicine cabinet... double shit.

I sighed knowing I'd have to get it together for an hour, I put on my sneakers and got in my car, driving to the grocery store, I parked closest to the entrance and once I walked in I went straight for the pharmacy section, I got my pain meds and decided to pick up some 'moment' foods, pizza pockets, sweet tea, jolly ranchers, and pain meds. a perfect shopping basket, as I was walking to the self-checkout someone lightly grabbed my shoulder "Y/N!" fuck "William." my voice was strained from screaming and crying, I turned around to face him, "hi!" he smiled "hi." I didn't smile back. "are you alright?" his smile wavered. "yes." he glanced down at my basket seeing the items that clearly wouldn't be bought by anyone healthy, mentally or physically...

"you sure? you know i-" I can't do this "goodbye Mr Afton." his smile dropped. I bought my items and practically ran to my car, I rushed home, surely breaking some speed limit... I parked and ran up to my apartment door, I fumbled with the keys and got into my apartment closing the door behind me, I collapsed, back against the door I cried. grocery bag in my left hand as I used my right hand to muffle my cries, I felt so awful, every part of my body stung and I felt like I was made of pure sadness

I hate being reminded of my son, it always sent me into a sudden and deep spiral 

--------major angst part ends----------

*knock knock knock*  "Y/N?"  he sounded so concerned, for some reason I didn't dread talking to him "hi..." I looked into his eyes, I'm so tired... "Y/N I know you aren't okay, you don't normally push people away like that" I sighed and looked down "did I do something? if I made you uncomfortable or if you want me to stop flirting I can-" I hugged him tightly and nuzzled my face in his chest as I felt more tears fall

I pulled him inside and closed the front door, I stepped away from him to make eye contact "n-no! you haven't done anything wrong I just-" I choked back, I cant tell him about that yet, he put a hand on my shoulder "you don't have to tell me" we looked at each other for a split second before we heard the front door unlocking, triple shit.

I grabbed his arm and ran to my room dragging him along, I got us inside and closed and locked the door, after a few seconds I hear Marie knock on my door "Y/N-"  no "I'm having a moment" she sharply inhaled and walked away, I sat down on the edge of my bed next to William "so, what's wrong?" he put his arm over my shoulder and gently rubbed my arm, I sighed "two years ago i-" I choked back on tears, he rubbed my arm reassuringly 

"two years ago I had a son... Lawrence" I could see and feel his shock, no matter how he tried to hide it, he looked down "I'm sorry..." he hugged me "it alright he just-" I sucked down the tears "its okay take your time love." love... god I love when he calls me that " when he was 4 he fell into a river and i- I couldn't save him..."

I felt so safe with William... "I'm so sorry love" i smiled sadly "you should call me that more" he softly chuckled "i will..."