Westedge

Epilogue: Acceptance

Epilogue

"I can no longer grasp reality with happiness."

???

___________________________

I had no idea what I thought anymore.

Everything was basically warped in time from that point onward. It was like all my feelings have been slowly warped from my heart and they just left.

Gone. Never to be returned.

That gave me the idea that there's nothing to really care for anymore. There is no point to live on.

Why live on if all of your emotions just... disappeared?

What's the point of standing on this earth if you have nothing to live for?

All my questions I have of life sound so similar, so connected, and they are. The only reason they are is the theories and possibilities that come out of each question. How each person would act differently with what they have.

And that? That changes the game of life completely.

It's been exactly 30 years since Alexander died, and pretty soon, everybody dropped like flies behind them. Some led to suicide, and others got into accidents. All of them did ask these questions, all of them did fall into a bad road, all because somebody who they never thought would go so soon, dropped like nothing.

All because they didn't know how to keep a strong mind after an important loss.

I'm the only one standing, and I stand along with grey hair Leo, as yes, he did fall down the forbidden, hollow path, but he looked up and decided to be with me, just as he always meant to.

After standing at each grave for hours to come, our cloaked in darkness figures quickly weaved through each grave until we reached my jeep, each of us almost pitying eachother.

Finally after a bit, he just stared at me, looking at me with the most glum, unsatisfied look I ever saw printed on his face.

"This isn't fair dammit! I feel like I'm still trapped in this wrecked, sick game. Why did everything go downhill so quickly??"

I took a deep breath, and looked at the lost puppy with sympathy, hoping it'll make him feel better a bit.

"Isn't it quite obvious? I always meant to tell you Leo, but you were selfish at the time, only thinking about yourself, thinking the world was focusing on you. Sorry buddy, it wasn't-"

"I didn't come here for a teaching lesson on something that's only your opinion. If I were you I would get along and tell me the damn point."

I sucked in a breath and stood my awkward stance, trying to put the right words together in the right sentence.

"The best way I could say it is well, everybody ignored everyone, and because of that, they all died a similar fate to Zona's, and that Leo? That's unforgivable, from all of us."

All he did was nod in place, almost like he was trying to understand something while dancing to a tempo. Finally he looked at me and muttered out the three words I never believed he would ever say out of his stubborn self,

"You're absolutely right."

I was outright shocked, but I did my best to keep a straight face and just nodded along with him, ending the conversation in place.

Finally, he had the bright idea of walking back to the row of graves, and we did, each of us straying away from my old jeep, only to the face each friend we've known since children.

That day was grey, almost like the 60's television. The skies were grey, our emotions were both drained and grey, and finally so were the graves. We stood silently this time, looking over each grave with a cringe, hating myself for not helping everybody instead of just one individual.

The two of us stared down at the ground saying our final prayers to these people who are terribly important.

To the people who I adore with all my heart.

To the people who influenced me and everybody else around them to not follow their path and to save themselves from the bad road of life.