Fragments Of A Broken Mind

XCVI

Everything that I do 

Is always going to be fun

As long as it's with you.

Cause you bring me peace.

You get me out of my head

And help me see the world.

You've been my laughter

And always been there

To wipe away my tears. 

So, yes. I do love you.

I love you so bad

That it physically hurts

When I see you cry.

I love you so much.

I really do.

But, I'll never understand,

Neither will I have the courage

To ask you

Why you would ever

Reciprocate the feelings

I hold for you in what feels like

A stronger way.

Why would you ever sit by me

And console me

When you could be out there,

Anywhere,

having the time of your life,

Making new friends?

Friends that aren't broken.

Friends that don't pretend.

Pretend they're okay,

That they're strong.

Why would you ever look at me,

Crying on the floor

And try to cheer me up

Like my laugh  is what

Keeps you going?

Cause I've got a reason

To love you the way I do.

It's cause you're you.

Cause you're always there.

Cause I know never to take

The simple fact that I have you

For granted.

But, you've got nothing,

No reason to stay beside me

Or stand up for me.

You've got no reason 

To hold my hand

Or lean all the way down

Just so I can rest my head 

On your shoulder.

You've got no reason

To turn to me and smile

When we both know

How sad I really feel.

Cause I've seen your smile dim

When I don't return it.

And, I've heard your words

Trail off in the middle of a sentence

When you think I'm not listening.

I've heard the long sighs 

And the soft sniffles,

The red nose and tear stained cheeks.

All of which I know I've caused.

So, yes. I do love you.

How could I not

When you're so you?

But, you've got no reason

To tell me you love me, now.

And, I'm afraid of saying it back

Cause I know that one day,

You'll wake up and realize that too.

A/n.

My finals are going on right now, so I shouldn't be posting. But, I did this dumb thing, and I thought I'd share it with y'all.

So, I had a paper today. And, I was shit-scared for it, okay? Like, seriously. I even cried cause I didn't think I'd do well. So, I studied what I could and I went to answer my paper. And, I reached my school, and all my friends and classmates had their English text books out. And,I'm like what the fuck? |WE HAVE ENGLISH? I DIDN'T STUDY ENGLISH! 

Ja, you'll should've seen me, I swear my eyes went round. Anywayyy, I've got great friend and classmates, and idk if you know this, but I'm not that bad at Hindi. So, with two minutes for the bell, they brushed me up and I answered my paper. I would've done better if I had studied, obviously, but I didn't do that bad.

Anyway, that was my dumbassery for this week.

ALSO, FOUR MORE CHAPTER AND WE'RE DONE. AHHH. I CAN'T DECIDE IF I' SCARED OR EXCITED.

Much love, ana_banana2103