all. my. fault. - genshin angst

my dear ayaka. (ayato/ayaka)

"Hey, can we go get dango? I heard the new vendor is really good!"

Yea, we can. Just one last time.

"Hey brother, why don't you nap? I can take care of the rest of the work you have."

Thank you, Ayaka.

"Brother."

...

"Brother, I love you."

Oh. I understand. If only I had the chance to hear those words once more.

I understand that the weight on your shoulders was too much to bear. I understand that what I said was quite harsh, I'm sorry. I tried. I'm sorry that I couldn't run faster

"BROTHER!!"

I was too far away, wasn't I? Mother always told you to stay nearby, and to not run off.

"brother.."

Ayaka.

"i'm sorry.."

Don't be. It's not your fault. You're cold, do you need a blanket? A hug?

"don't tell them. just say.. i went on a trip."

Ayaka.. you know I can't do that.

"please."

Ayaka...

They found out. I'm sorry. As head of the Kamisato Clan, I have failed. I thought my job was to protect and stabalize Inazuma. My beliefs got in the way of the truth. I realise now. So, let me write you a letter as an apology.

My dear Ayaka,

Do you remember the day that we took a nice walk all the way to the Narukami shrine? I remember you wanted to pull a fortune slip, what an event that was.. The slip you had said "Everything will be lifted off your shoulders in no time, but at the cost of freedom must come guilt." Little did we know. If only I had the chance to protect you. I understand the mistakes I made, for I am at fault. I'm sorry for blaming you. You did nothing wrong. Was it I.. who.. drove you. To your breaking point. If it was then, I also apologise for that. Yet, an apology is not enough. 

You know what, forget the formality. Why?! Was I the one that KILLED you?! I ran so fast.. I should have never let you outside that day. You were suffering, weren't you? What did I do wrong? What could I have fixed? 

"AYAKA!!!"

It should have been me. Beneath all your smiles and sunshine, it was all gone, wasn't it. I took it. I pushed you so far. All I wanted was for you to not make the same mistakes as me. I just wanted you to have a happier life than I did, and yet, I did the opposite.  First we lost father, then mother, and now i've lost you. I really can't handle any of this anymore. I would follow in your footsteps, but I just need the right time. 

So, let me start over, give me one last chance to fix things.

My dear sister. I love you. So much.

You know, the wind is so fresh today. I got a new sword, gifted by the shogun herself. The sakuras are starting to bloom, spring was your favourite season, wasn't it? Thoma is busy cleaning the estate. He misses you, a lot. It's a bit too quiet without you around. Inazuma is even quieter now that you're gone. It almost feels like the air got.. thinner. I'm on top of Mt. Yougou right now, the view of the ocean is quite beautiful.

The weight on my shoulders has been quite heavy as well since you left. I've decided to take a break.

I can't wait to see you again.

Thank you.

From your brother, Ayato.

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OK that is the end.

it was a bit short cause it's been a while and im pooped on sadness.

again pls give me angst recs!!!!

ok bye <33



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