all. my. fault. - genshin angst

i waited so long. (Shenhe x Yelan)

tw// su!c!d3

it was the evening. the wind blows ever so lightly against Shenhes tear filled face as she stands alone on a hill with Yelan. She stares emptily into Yelan, as if Yelan weren't there. Yelan bows her head in shame.

"Shenhe.." she shakes her head in disbelief

"Please just. Stop crying."

Shenhe snaps back to reality in an instant, furrowing her eyebrows while looking at Yelan. Still confused about the situation. Yelan tries to speak to Shenhe, but all she can hear is the light ringing in her ear that's making everything so blurry.

"i need to get out of here..." Shenhe whispers under her breath.

"What-?"

"i need to leave" Shenhe says in a hurry.

She turns to the pathway and quickly makes her exit, Yelan following her.

"Shenhe? Shenhe! Shenhe slow down-!"

Yelan runs after Shenhe reaching out for her arm to slow her down. She catches up and latches onto her shoulder to turn her around. She's met with a shove from Shenhe, almost falling to the ground. Shenhe is facing the ground, knees weak and fists clenched.

"What the hell??" Yelan said.

Shenhe, panting heavily as tears fall to the ground. Her hair all messy as she seems out of breath. A piercing pain arises from her chest as she tries to speak. Her throat closes tightly and has a grip as strong as a snake trying to choke her.

"i.. loved you.." she said weakly.

"What?"

Shenhe raises her head. Her eyes red and puffy from the crying.

"i loved you."

"Look I-"

"how could you say that."

"I didn't mean it like-"

"how. how could you EVER say something like that to me."

Shenhe raises her head in anger. Her teeth grinding as she snaps at Yelan. Her fists tighten with a look of fear and emptiness in her eyes as they widen.

"did you even love me back?" Shenhe says with the little bit of lasting hope she has left.

Yelan puts her arms by her side and sighs. She opens her mouth to form words but nothing comes out. She shuts her mouth as her lips tremble. She turns her eyes away from Shenhes devastating face.

"you can't even look at me.."

Shenhe starts to hyperventilate out of distress. She holds her stomach as it turns and turns. She falls to the ground gasping for air. Her throat closing off even more. She takes one big gasp to let it all out. She starts to violently sob in front of yelan, who is doing nothing to help her. Rocking herself back and forth to try and calm herself.

"p-please... yelan please i beg of you..."

"..."

Yelan stays silent in fear of shenhe hearing her silently cry as well.

"tell me you never loved me. i need to hear it"

Choked up, yelan says "I can't do that. That's too cruel"

"i don't care. say it"

Yelan takes a deep breath and prepares herself.

"I.."

silence.

"say it."

"I- .. I never.. loved you."

The wailing and crying stops. Shenhe stops moving. Yelan couldn't bear the sight of the pain that Shenhe was going through. She made the choice to walk away after admitting she never loved shenhe. Shenhe got up and walked home. She sat on her bed for hours, eventually curling up to coddle herself to sleep. She stayed in her bed for days. No water, no food, little to no sleep. A week had gone by since she had last seen Yelan. Everyone was worried about Shenhe. Ganyu had come over once or twice to see if she was home, but there was no response at the door. One day, Shenhe got up from her bed. She went to the kitchen to feed herself. She had a small vine of grapes and a cracker. She went out to the back shed that had enough room to have a couple shelves with boxes in them.

⚠️ (UPCOMING IS THE PART, LOOK FOR THE SAME EMOJI TO SKIP IT)

She filed through the boxes to find a rope. She had used some of it on an adventure or for training once, but she didn't use all of it. She carried the rope on her shoulder and walked with heavy footsteps to her bedroom. She tied the rope to a hook on her ceiling., creating a noose. She stood there in complete silence as she stared at the chair before her, underneath the rope. She went to fue washroom to get ready for the day. She brushed her teeth, took a shower, did her hair messily, and washed her face. She watched her favourite show on TV for a couple hours. Then she read her favourite book. Then the time came. She opened her bedroom door that had been previously shut, walked into the room, and then locked the door.

⚠️

The next day, Yelan walked past Shenhes house. feeling guilty, she turned around after a while and headed back. She knocked on her door aggressively.

"Shenhe I know you're in there!!"

Silence.

Yelan starts to get impatient as she waits for an answer at the door.

"I can hear the TV. If you don't answer i'm gonna bust in"

Minutes pass by. Yelan makes the executive deduction to kick down Shenhes door. She walks into the house to see the TV was on, but nobody was watching. She searched her kitchen, nothing but un done dishes from weeks ago. She approached the bedroom door, afraid of what she might find. She puts her ear up against the door.

"Shenhe?"

No response. She put her hand on the cold door knob slowly twisting it.

And then the door opens.

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hey gang