Outcast (a lashton fanfiction)

Chapter 22

I timidly approach Ashton. My chest heavy and body shaking.

"Ashton?" I ask quietly.

"What Luke?" He snapped. "Come to ruin things more?"

"I didn't mean for this to happen." I say under my breath. I didn't know we were photographed kissing, neither did he. This wasn't our fault. The picture was from someone standing a ways off. We hadn't seen them there, and they decided to wait until the moment they knew they could hurt me most. 

"It doesn't matter if you meant it! It happened! And now I'm out to the entire school! Everyone is going to bully me and think I'm a pathetic joke! Just like you." He yelled. The last part hit me hard, I felt like the air had been knocked from me. He's never said something like that, not even when we fought. "I don't even care about you! I'm not gay!" 

I screwed up so bad. I started to shake harder, my wrist itching. I started to tear up, I tugged on my hair. "Ashton, i'm sorry please say you didn't mean that." I looked at him.

"No Luke, you just ruined me. You just ruined my life, you were probably planning this the whole time, to get pay back for being mean to you. You probably meant to destroy my reputation, pathetic. I lost all my friends because of you goddamn it. No wonder you don't have any. At least i can tell mine that i was faking." He spat. I felt my heart shatter and my stomach drop. I let the tears fall as I turned and ran to the car. Sobs escaped my lips as I tried to start it. 

I heard the engine roar to life and I started driving. Where can I go? Not home, my parents can't see me like this. Bella was gone. Michael is dealing with too much already, he doesn't need my useless self coming to him. I have no one else. I drove to the graveyard. After I stopped the car, I got out, and made my way to Bella's grave.

"Bella what do I do? I have no one left. I wish you were here to make one of your sarcastic remarks and make me feel better. I wish I could hug you after and thank you for everything. I just wish you were here. I need you so much. Ashton doesn't love me. He never did Bells." I leaned against her grave crying. This is all to much. "Maybe I should come see you." I whisper. I sit down and send a message out.

"Goodbye - Luke." I clicked their contacts and hit send. I was numb all over, my senses dull and my heart ached.

I looked at Bella's grave and ran my finger tips over the words carved into the stone. Maybe i'll have a stone near hers. "See you soon." I know I had decided to move just then, and I was walking somewhere. But I didn't know exactly where, until I noticed the path. It was the one to the bridge. I was gonna fall. It was a short walk. 10 minutes at most. My phone was going off like mad in my pocket but I couldn't bring myself to look. This is the best choice, this is the only choice. Until i felt my it ringing and pulled it out. Ashton. I had to answer it.

"Luke please don't do this please this isn't right." I could hear him in tears and the panic in his voice. I had done it again, I had hurt him again. God i'm such a screw up.

"I thought you were faking it. Faking our first kiss, faking it when you took my virginity, you never cared about me. Everything will be better without me."

"Luke, please where are you? I didn't mean anything I said, I was just scared, I love you more than anything." He said, you could hear his voice shake.

"You can't stop me. You just don't want to feel responsible for my death."

"Please give me a hint or something, anything, Princess, please." Princess. He called me princess again. Even though he had told me he was faking it, that pet name pulled at my heart. 

"Heights." I say and end the call. I had reached the bridge. I stopped and looked. It was beautiful, the sunset against the sky. The moving water roared under me, I couldn't help but just stand and stare at it.