Amends (Sambucky)

Chapter Fourty-Eight

"And what if I don't make it back?" Sam questioned, his voice fierce with emotion.

"You will."

"What if you're right, and Riley is my death?" Sam insisted, his face inches from Bucky's.

"Then we'd both know that you killed yourself because you can take Riley any day. You are perfectly capable of handling yourself," Bucky held firm.

Sam balled his fist angrily, "That's not the point. I'm not leaving for you to do the dirty work; I can find the coordinates."

"I'd never forgive myself if I let you go," Bucky spoke angrily, fully intending to hurt Sam with his every word. He thought it was the only way he ever listened, "I wouldn't forgive myself because there's no way in hell you survive this. Got it? I don't believe you can do it."

"You're lying," Sam spat, "You're full of shit, but whatever. Go. Find the stupid coordinates, and after you can tell me if it's worth it."

"I'm not ly-,"

"You are! I'm not stupid. You poured your heart and soul to me; you can't take that back," Sam spoke in disbelief.

"And even if you could, I know what I'm capable of. I know my limits. I've survived decades before meeting you, and if I choose, I'll survive decades after," he narrowed his eyes, "I'll play along with your plan, but you can't scare me off when times get hard. You can't convince me not to like you because you want me safe— it's stupid. It won't work."

"Your stubbornness is your worst trait," Bucky asserted, "And it's second only to your naivety and willingness to forgive."

"Is that so?"

"Yes-," Bucky was cut off by Sam's lips on his, before Sam abruptly pulled away. He couldn't help but stand in silence.

"My naivety has gotten me this far. Gotten me here to you, to whatever the hell we are."

"We aren't a thing! We are partners, who unfortunately are driven to each other!" Bucky insisted, pushing Sam away like he always did when times got hard. It was the only way to keep himself safe, "Our relationship is built on circumstance, on lust. It won't last. There's no good feelings in me, toward you. If you have any ounce of self-respect, you'll go. And you'll drop the idea of us together in any other way."

"You love me! You can't lie! You can't block out your feelings when it's hard," Sam tried not to grow angry, but his lack of sleep over the days was catching up to him.

Bucky shook his head, "I was in the moment. I may love you, but I'm not in love with you."

"Fine. But there's something you should know then," Sam stood close to Bucky, so he could feel his breath on his lips,

"I'm listening to you for my safety, which is all I care about. I didn't answer your confession earlier because there were no words for me to say. I have nothing for you, James Barnes. You mean nothing to me."

~~~~~

"He's not wrong, you know?"

"Shut up."

"You don't even know what I'm talking about," Riley rolled his eyes, waving people along to the kitchen.

"About what Bucky said earlier. My worst traits."

"I stand corrected. You do have a brain," Riley admitted, "Makes sense. The giant bimbo follows you around like a lapdog; someone had to form a coherent thought."

Riley opened his mouth to talk again, but immediately shut it when Sam grabbed him by his collar, allowing the guests to stare as they moved to safety.

Sam couldn't afford to give into Riley; his mind was already scattered as it was. He couldn't help but feel like he was doing the wrong thing by taking the way out with Riley, helping the people to safety. He was sure letting all of the criminals go would bite him in the ass later.