My Fierce Fragile Heart

Chapter 7. THE FRIEND, THE ENEMY

Jaiyanna Evie Lenna Suarez ( Jai) POV

Dalawang buwan na ang nakalipas ang pagbisita namin sa Korea . Matapos kong maging masaya at matapos kong maiwala ang pinaka mamahal kong panyo.

Muli kong naalala ang naging reaksyon ko nang mapansin kong wala na ito sa bag ko . Sobrang inis , lungkot at pang hihinayang.

That's my favorite one. Mom gave me that when I was just 16, exactly the day I found out about my heart's problem, I used it first on my deepest cry in my entire life . It was customized , my intials we're written there and basta hindi yun ordinaryong panyo lang. Bawat tahi sa tela nun ay may kahulugan sa akin ,kasi galing yun kay mama. Ibang sentimental value ang meron yun.

It's always in the pocket of my bag, although di ko naman talga sya ginagamit . I just feel like carrying it with me all the time. Mahalaga yun saakin. So ganun nalang talga disappointment ko na naiwala ko yun.

Anyway, I have to move on. Wala naman akong magagawa pa. Hindi na maibabalik yun sa akin , ang layo ng Korea ,imposibleng may makapulot nun at libotin ang mundo para maibalik lang .

I sighed and gently put my last paper in my envelope.
I'm currently preparing my documents for enrollment.
Yes, of course I'm still a student. I'm just 19 after all.

First , I'd like to formally introduce myself.
I'm Jaiyanna Evie Lenna Suarez , a Bachelor of Secondary Education student Major in English .

Hobbies ? Dancing, writing, reading and studying other languages. Singing as well including writing song , although I never actually shared what I wrote.

Many people wondered why I chose Education instead of auditioning to be in the Industry of entertainment. Kesyo napaka talented ko daw, maganda pa at kung ano ano pang positive comments sa akin but then, ayoko. It's not that I'm not confident with my skills in dancing and singing. Ayoko lang tlga sa ganoong industriya.

May mga modeling agencies din na kumukuha sa akin , but I take them down.

Hindi ko gusto ang buhay ng isang model, artista, singer o dancer . I want a normal life with my mom. A happy life with her . Yun lang. So I just want an ordinary profession as well, but specifically I wanted to be a college professor or a tutor.

I want to teach or be a language teacher. Something that involves speaking to people in English . So I took BSEd and majored in English , kasi ako din I wanted to be a good speaker ,and I wanted to enhance my language skills.

Kaya naman minsan hindi ko maiwasang mainis pag kinukwestyon nila ang course ko .

Pag lina " lang" lang ang pagiging isang guro .

My mom is Emile Eve Suarez, she's a manager of a five star hotel . Unfortunately, a single mom .
Looking young , mukhang dalaga lang ang mama ko. Para nga lang daw kami magkapatid minsan . Well I couldn't disagree, napakaganda ng mama ko , and I can't say na hindi ako nagmana . Hmmm crap !

Napaka supportive nyan ni mama , she didn't question my chosen course, she never go against my habits and my preferences.

Hindi kami sobrang mayaman pero naibibigay nya lahat sa akin , everything that I need and I want, we travel, go in expensive restaurants pero hindi kami kinakapos sa pera , maraming ipon si mama bago nya iwan ang modeling career nya.

Yes, she's a model when she was younger , pero yun nga. She got to taste the life of being popular which she can't stand . Ayaw nya ng buhay na sikat. She also wants a normal life , yung malaya lang. Yung hindi binabantayan bawat kilos nya. And I understand her, that's also the kind of life that I want.