the disastrous life of tommyinit - ftm au

18

tw pills, attempted suicide, sh implied, blood. mental hospital mentiam 

- Nobody pov - 

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"o-oh my god," Tommy said. His heart sped up, and he felt sick.  "bo i-i, please i- Please wake up" Tommy said running into the wall. Tears ran down his face. "you stay here okay..? I'm gonna g-go get Phil." Tommy said running. He froze as he walked out the door. 'would Phil even care? he's not tubbos dad.' he thought. Tommy ignored this, running into his house. "Tay? you alright?" Phil asked.  He noticed the tears, and sweat running down his face.

"shit, you okay?" Phil asked. Tommy panted, "t-tubbo h-he, p-pills, i-i," Tommy said trying to catch his breath. "hetiredtokillhimselfandnowidontknowwhattodo," Tommy said. "Woah, Woah buddy I'm gonna need you to slow down," Phil said running his fingers in his hair. "he said tubbo tried to kill himself." Techno said. "you understand him like that?" Phil asked. "yeah," techno said walking out the door. 

"ww-what's up with him?" Tommy asked. "I don't know, he's been like that since the hospital," Phil said. Techno walked into tubbos house going to his body. "two attempted suicides?" He mumbled.  Techno cleaned up the pills, and water everywhere. He shook tubbo a bit trying to make sure he wasn't just passed out. "t-techno?" Tubbo said. "hey," techno said smiling. Tears streamed down Tubbos face. 

"w-why- wh-" He mumbled. "hey,? You okay..?" Techno asked. "oh g-god. W-what.. did I do?" Tubbo said backing away from techno. His heart sped up. "Toby- you need to calm down!" Techno yelled. "i-i I want tom- i-" Tubbo said. "Tommy?" Tubbo nodded. techno ran to his house looking for Tommy. He was on the couch panicking. "T-Tech? I-is...He alive..?" Tommy asked. "Yeah, he's awake rn." Techno said. "h-he's awake!?" Tommy said wiping his eyes. 

Tommy ran as fast as he ever could out that door, and into tubbos house. "TUBBO!?" Tommy screamed. He ran to the bathroom seeing tubbo panic. "Tommy i-i I'm sorry!" Tubbo said. "Tubb- I'm not mad i-" Tommy said. "can I touch you?" Tommy asked bending down. Tubbo nodded. Tommy sat down rubbing tubbos back. "t-tom?" Tubbo said. "yeah?" "d-do you care for me..?" Tommy froze. "of course I do?" Tommy said.

Tubbo felt sick, he threw up over himself and Tommy. "WHAT THE HELL!" Tommy yelled. Tubbo covered his ears. "oh- shit, Tubbs I'm sorry." Tommy said. His body was telling himself to get sick. "to-Tommy, p-please, c-can you call my dad?" Tubbo asked. "y-yeah," Tommy said. "TECHNO!" Tommy screamed. "heh?" "Can you call tubbos dad? Thanks!" Tommy said going back into the bathroom. 

He sat down next to tubbo. "does ranboo know you did this?" Tommy asked. "n-no, I don't think we should tell him, he'll worry too much, he already knows about my wrist stuff, it's gonna get worst if I tell him this"  Tubbo said. "m, you and Ranboos relationship is good innit?" Tommy mumbled. "I g-guess, I don't know" Tubbo mumbled. 

Techno knocked on the door. "toby, your dad said he would be here in  10 minutes." He said. Tubbo nodded. "thank you techno" He mumbled. "I'll be back," Tommy said getting up. He walked to his house to get his phone. He came back sitting next to tubbo. "w-what you do?" Tubbo asked. "I got my phone," I said spinning it. "mm" he mumbled. 

Tommy pov 

"do you want me to tell ranboo, Tubbs?" I asked. "c-can you just tell him I relapsed? I don't w-want him to know I tried to overdose.." Tubbo said. "mhm." I said. I opened up discord.  "c-can you ask him to come over?"  he asked me

Tommy >:3: Hey boo! 

ranboob: mm what? trying to sleep rn 

Tommy >:3: Sleeps for the weak imagen

ranboob: Eh, but is smth wrong?

Tommy >:3: Tubbo relapsed and he wants you to come over, for comfort

ranboob: mm sorry cant, I have to sleep

Tommy>:3: alr.

"he said he had to sleep and he couldn't," I said. "mm alright," he said. "TOBY!" Someone screamed. "DAD?!" Tubbo screamed. jschlatt ran into the room. "dad!" Tubbo said running to him. He started to cry. "what happened..?" He asked. "I'm sorry! i-i" tubbo said. "I'm not mad, just what happened?" He said. "m-my body i-i" "what's wrong with your body? is it your wrist?" jschlatt asked. "n-no! I hate the way my body looks! i-am to fat- a-and my body curls weird, i-I' Tubbo said, going into a full panic.  

"toby, calm down, breath okay? listen to my heart," Schatt said. "I'm leaving." I said getting up and leaving. "t-Tommy?" Tubbo said. I went up to techno. "come on let's go." I said going home. "you're just leaving  tubbo?" He asked me. "he has his dad." I said walking in the door. I ran to my bed throwing myself into it.

Phil saw as I did. "is she okay?" He asked techno. "I dunno, h-shes probably mad over Wilbur?" Techno said. "ah, shit- speaking of Wilbur, I gotta register him for the hospital-" Phil said. "when is he going?" techno asked. "Tomorrow, I would rather him get it over with than wait" "yeah, I guess that makes sense, should I get him some stuff to bring?" Tecno asked. "sure," Phil said leaving to get into his car.

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"This is your fault" A voice whispered. "w-what?" Tommy said. "It's your fault Wilbur and tubbo tried to kill themselves." The voice whispered again. "n-no!" Tommy said. "it is, you murder." "what! I'm not a murderer! they're still alive!" Tommy screamed. "you. are. still. a . murder." "no-no! somebody, dad! techno! pl-please, h-help me!" Tommy cried. "they can't help you, This is your problem. You need to fix it."  The voice whispered. "How do I fix it!" Tommy said. "harm yourself." The voice whispered. "w--what? no-no!" Tommy screamed. "then you cant fix it." 

"TOMMY!" Someone screamed in the distance. Tommy heard it threw this panic. Tommy opened his eyes. Techno was on the bed, he had both his hands on Tommy holders. However, Tommy didn't, see techno, he saw his father. "NO! DON'T TOUCH ME Y-YOU! y-you" Tommy said, trying to finish his sentence but failing to fall to the ground and crying. Tommy looked down at his wrist, they were covered in blood. "N-NO!" He screamed. "Tommy, there's nothing there." Techno said. "n-no stop lying! there's blood everywhere!" "Tommy. There's not." Tommy realized, his dad wasn't there, it was techno. He threw himself into techno. 

"it's okay. I promise" Techno said kissing tommys head lightly. [NOT SHIPPING THIS IS BROTHER LOVE >:[  ALL IS /P ]     "i-am sorry i-i" Tommy said sobbing. "shhh, it's okay." Techno whispered. Tommy fell asleep just like that. Techno chuckled. "love ya toms," He said kissing his head again. [/p] 

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AHHHHHHHH

So uh turns out I don't like dsmp anymore??? but I will still update this as a coping mechnosinme! 

The next chapter will be wilbur in the hospital wooo