Locked In The Mind-Scape

#2- Escape Is A Tiring Subject

𝘿𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨.
𝙈𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖 𝙙𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣, 𝙚𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙘𝙚𝙙 𝙞𝙣 𝙖 𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙛 𝙥𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙧, 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙙𝙞𝙛𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙪𝙡𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙙𝙤. 𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙤 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙙𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙞𝙨 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙛𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙙𝙤𝙢 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙘𝙠. 𝘿𝙚𝙨𝙥𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨, 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙖𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙗𝙚 𝙖 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙖 𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝙢𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙗𝙚 𝙢𝙖𝙙𝙚. 𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙝𝙖𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙖 𝙙𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣.. 𝙒𝙚𝙡𝙡, 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙥𝙧𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙤𝙣𝙚..

'If we don't leave now, we will never be able to.' Mika persisted, Skyler ignoring her as she sat at the breakfast table, pulling a plate of pancakes towards herself and using her fork to place two of them onto her plate. She took the syrup dispenser from the middle of the table, and tilting it lightly, let it spill out till it covered the pancakes to her liking. She added wiped cream and  just enough cut-up strawberry slices to cover it up, out of sight.

"Hitoshi, don't forget to get the forks, I forgot to set them up when I put everything on the table." A dark stern voice spoke, head popping in from the living room to look Skyler in the eyes. The teen nodded, humming quietly in acknowledgment as she never took her dark lilac eyes from the man’s, unwilling to deepen his obviously cold mood by losing eye contact.

Kenme always seemed to hate it when they wouldn't look him nor Kareen in the eyes. He saw it as a sign of deep disrespect, and as far as Skyler knew, they'd get hit for it, sometimes worse. Skyler only held so many memories, however, she knew that their main trauma holder's were Tristan and Mika. Well, they were their only current ones, to her knowledge.

About two years back, they had an alter that Skyler breifly remembered. Although, at the time, she thought of him as more like an inner thought process than an alter, having not known much at all about DID at the time. The alter always refered to himself as 'nothingness', a black void only there to hold what nobody else seemed able to. However, one day, he seemed to simply vanish. He went dormant and Skyler couldn't really remember exactly when. All she knew was that after that, Mika and Tristan held most of the traumatic memories. Tristan because she was the gatekeeper, and Mika mostly because she was the one who aggravated and caused the adults anger the most.

It wasn't that she wanted to be hurt, but only that she knew of nothing else she could do to stop them. She refused to pretend to be Hitoshi, and for that, she received great amounts of abuse and 'punishment'. At least, punishment was the name the adults had given the events that had often occurred.

Breakfast went by in a blurr for Skyler, as did lunch and soon after, the majority of the day. All she remembered was switching out with Rocky, and than being once more out several hours later around 4pm when a glass plate was thrown at her, hitting the wall of the hallway, the glass shards scattering, some sinking into her soft pail skin.

As a protector, Skyler always felt a defensive need to put an end to the danger immediately. However, she knew she couldn't. Despite trying over and over again after seeing how a protector, qoute on quote, was 'supposed' to act. She couldn't stop it. Being a protector alter gave her no magic powers, nor did it give her a way to halt the unending abuse. It only ever gave her a maternal craving to do so, and a guilty conscience for never being able to.