A cold inquisitor

The Questions

What had that moment been? What significance did it hold? Was there any? Did he intend to take it that far? What had she been thinking, it had been a classic case of hook, line and sinker, hadn't it?  

She had numerous questions running through her mind since that night. Surely a little kiss meant little to nothing, it had been nothing. It had to of been nothing of  importance, there were already many more pressing issues to take of. Soldiers needed ram meat to fill their bellies, clothes for the cold weather, materials for better armor,  metals for weaponry, there was much that needed to be done, those were the easy issues. There were far more pressing matters in regards to the rifts and the demons spilling out of that hellish maul.  The Hinderlands had their fair share of problems, once she solved most of them she would tend to others elsewhere. 

She spent a few days without seeing him, actively trying to avoid him for the time being. He noticed not very long after she would find some excuse to leave or create some imaginary situation that needed her attention. To say he took it lightly was an understatement. What started as confusion for him very quickly turned to realization.  By the end of day two, she was just coming back from the war room, issuing tasks to be taken care of. Her mind was deep in thought, wondering if she made the right decisions, what the results of their efforts would be, too deep to notice the short and stocky figure hiding in a darkened corner. They were snatched out of their thoughts when that figure reached out and grabbed her by the wrist, she felt a strong pull that took her off her feet. She couldn't even yelp with surprise, as a gloved hand reached up to cover her mouth.  " We need to talk."  Soon as she heard the voice, any surprise or shock she had dissipated, feeling the hand move from her mouth and instead being pulled through a door, going further inside the building to its more isolated wing.  " What the hell Varric?" She asked, incredulous and irritated. 

When it was just them and the comfort of lit torches for company the dwarf who had been stewing in silence thus far finally spoke up. 

" Have i done something wrong? Is there a reason you've been acting like this?" He was angry. It was carved in his face, but his tone was oddly calmer than she was expecting for those words. " Varric, I don't have time for this, there's a war going on and a breach to seal, i need to-"  She tried to speak, evening now seemingly scrambling.  He hadn't let go of her wrist, and when she made the effort to pull away he latched on even more, both his hands were on her, holding her by both her upper arms, pulling her towards him, forceing her to bend down to his level. " NO. No, you can't just worm your way out, not like you did the rift. I, I can't let you do that to me."  He sounded a tinge desperate, or what that irritation mixed with exasperation?  

She had been a cold person most of her life. Building walls, rarely letting someone in. She knew she was making a big mistake, and she thought she didn't feel bad about it. She was wrong, and looking down at him, feeling his hands holding her that tight, seeing the pain in his eyes.. those beautiful, pained eyes. ' Oh Varric, you'll bring out the worst of me with those eyes..' She thought to herself. 

Sighing with some frustration and admittedly defeat, she tried to calm him, both those hands reaching to cup his face, running her thumbs over his stubbled cheeks. " Look, its not you. There is, a lot going on right now. " She paused for a moment, searching for her words carefully, " There is a lot going on with me. I, I know what i did was wrong. I was just doing my best to ignore everything that could possibly go wrong, even if that meant ignoring you."  

She couldn't tell what he was thinking, feeling him shake a little less, but his face went unreadable. He licked his dry lips, needing a moment to figure out what he wanted to say, needed to say. His eyes darted away from her, to the stone wall and back again to her.  

" You won't do it again, please don't make me beg. Don't make me look like a fool. Don't make a fool out of me. I get that feeling, the world around you is always plotting to get you. Every good thing feels like it doesn't last. And, that's meant to hurt you."  He started, leaning into the palm of one of her hands and she could feel him press a kiss to it, to her mark.  She was giving him the attention she had starved him of, feeling the guilt eat her up inside. It was a new feeling, something she long since rendered impossible anymore. This man was something else, stirring her up, making her run and forcing her into a corner of shame. Did he truly have any idea what he was capable of? Could he see it in her eyes? The way she pressed herself a little closer, and slowly fell to her knees, making the two of them eye level with each other. 

" I'm not going to do that to you. But I wont let you do it to me either. No more running, no more hiding. Please, just.. " She stopped him, " I..I'm sorry. I won't do it again, I didn't know what to do, but i won't do it again, never again. "  

She wasn't a cryer by any means. She had almost died countless times, seen horrors unimaginable, and had made very cold and calculated choices to stroke her own ego and suit her needs as she saw fit, even back in the mages circle. But now, she had tears welling up, and he had chosen to give her mercy, moving his arms around her and pulling her into his chest, a few droplets finally falling down her pale face, stricken with guilt, her tears dripping and staining his favorite red and gold shirt. She could feel a hand on the back of her head, combing through those soft locks of hers. 

" Shhhhhh.. I believe you, i know you won't."  

He had a feeling this was a long time coming, she was bound to break at some point or other. He knew that he had probably done some selfish things in his life before, and rarely did he feel bad about them. But this, this was different. They were similar in some ways, so while it hurt a great deal to be on the ignored side, he understood why she did what she did..  He just held her, trusting her enough to give her the chance to hold onto her promise. Later, they'd have to have some form of heart to heart conversation.