A cold inquisitor

What is hard

'Some days are hard. Others are harder. Then you have those days where you hardly notice.'

Evelynn, The mage, " The Herald of Andraste", sat at the makeshift bar. She thought she knew what hard was before. Everyday seemed to prove her wrong each time. She closed her eyes, and all she could think of was that awful future she had prevented. Lilianna, aged and jaded from torture. There was red lirium glowing and growing from everywhere, even from the living and dead she passed by, still locked away in their cells to rot and be forgotten over. 

He tried to kill her. He instead ended up sending her no more than a year into the future. She and Dorian both. Together, he helped her find the others. Bull had been sitting in his cell, surprised to see the two alive and there. He hadn't looked too good. Who would have thought red lirium poisoning to be a bitch? But he seemed content to die as long as he was fighting. A wish she recalled he got not too long after. So far it was a nightmare, even the hundred other horrors she saw in the span of a few hours didn't make her stomach drop as heavy as when she found Varric. Dying, red lirium coloring his blue eyes red from the inner iris. It even seemed to echo out of his voice when he spoke. 

" Varric are you alright, you don't look too good.." 

" You watch your tongue, i look pretty good for a dead man." 

And he did. 

Even when he was there beside her, dying, he was still smirking. He seemed happier than she expected him to be at seeing she was alive, and relived further when he heard the chance of this future never coming true. 

" Varric, Dorian thinks we can stop this future. We need to find the amulet that brought us here, that bastard Gereon should still have it, do you know where he might be?"

" Heh, I hope so. Everyone thought you two were dead. I thought you died right there in front of me.. Instead, here you are. Alive no less. If we're going to do this, if your going to make sure this future never happens, then he should be upstairs somewhere, iv heard he never leaves his room. Come on, Me and Bianca will cover you two. " 

In the end, she killed him. Watched him burn at the end of her staff. Watched as Varric and Bull fought to their deaths, their bodies dropping to the floor when they finally busted through the doors. Lilianna, tortured and hardened, fought with vigor and desperation. Even as an arrow cut and stood from her shoulder and eventually, overpowered.. 

The memories of the whole ordeal was hard, it felt like she had the weight of all those horrors chained to her, unwilling to release her. Even if she was trying to find it at the bottom of a mug filled with nasty tasting ale. 

' What, what was the point of all that-'

She turned to look over her shoulder. Bull, Solas, Cassandra, Lilianna and even Dorian were gathered around a table, surrounded by other faces. They all seemed happy, entranced as before them Varric held a heavy mug in one hand, while the other was almost frantic, by the look on his face and how proudly he stood, he was midway through some exaggerated tale of his. 

' If i lose him again, and everything still turns out as it did?'

Varric midway through his story seemed to notice her looking, that frantic hand of his stopped whatever act of his tale it was reenacting, instead motioning her to join him. 

Normally she would have ignored the invite, he would either let her be and annoyed her later, or he'd have come over and pulled her in anyway. This time however, she actually got up and happily came over. As soon as she sat down, he had quickly wrapped that arm around her waist, pulling her in closer, quicker than she had been expecting him to. 

" Finally warming up to me, i thought for a moment id have to drag you over. I was just telling a story about how i once hijacked a horse from this noble ass!" He explained, seeming rather excited. Either from his own tale of grandeur or maybe at having her willingly decide to hear it with everyone else. She could also swear she saw those blue eyes of his glint with a certain.. she couldn't put it into words. There was something there.. was it the ale? 

" Might as well, I'll forget it in the morning anywho." She retorted, smirking at him and going to take another drink from her cup, just to have it quickly stopped. His hand had found the top, and was carefully forcing it down and away from her mouth. 

" Actually, i think you'll want to remember it. I would like you to remember this." 

She could feel her cheeks go slightly warm, but she didn't fight against him. letting her heavy cup rest on the old wooden table. 

" Very well Varric, lets hear the rest of this then." 

She found her voice to be the softest it had ever been. He sounded like he wanted her to really recall his story, but was a tale of horse thieving really that important? None the less, she found herself listening shortly, he picked up from where he left off but his arm stayed firm and still around her waist, only giving a slight squeeze when he would look back at her, just to find her just as entranced in his radical tale as she rest of the table.  

By the end of the night, she was tired but happy. He had told many tales, as well as hearing her own and those of others. He had given her a distraction, that seemed to be the key to unlocking all the chains of burden she was carrying with her by herself at the bar. He came out with her, both having left after it was getting too late to stay. 

" Varric, do you enjoy harboring my time?" She asked him, once it was just the two of them not too far from their separate tents, but away from other ears. 

" That depends. Are you asking if i enjoy the time i have with you, or if i enjoy stealing it from you?" He retorted back, words slightly slurred, looking up at her with tired eyes that held some haze to them. 

" Both." 

She needed to know. What did he seek to take from her, it always started with time. With patience. And eventually, she'd find them trying to find a reason to distrust or eye her at a cold distance.  

" I intend to know a reason don't i, most people find my company least appealing. Well, unless they need a rift sealed." 

He looked at her almost incredulous. but then, a smirk creeped onto the corner of his lips. a rough chuckle coming from him. 

" If you dare to believe it, I think your more than who you let on to be. I don't think your tough act goes deeper than skin, and, maybe i want to see who you really are. " 

A smirk tugged at the corner of her own lips, looking down at him, both covered in the light of the breach in the sky from the distance. 

" As you wish then, As you wish."