Scared Of Healing

CT

It is officially day 5 of Ellie's hospital admission and I have just gotten off the phone with a Cystic Fibrosis specialist in Sydney, they are working on finding Ellie's file in their clinic records but they want a chest CT to update their knowledge. I am very hopeful that they will find her records and that it will give more answers about this very complicated story, but for now we just have to focus on getting the CT.

I have ordered the CT and am waiting for radiology to call up to tell us that they're ready for her. Instead, I get a page, asking for me to call radiology when I can so I immediately make my way to the nurses station of the ward I'm in and call down. "This is Dr Clifford, I was paged to call, presumably about my patient awaiting a chest CT" I say into the phone. "Yes, are we using contrast for the imaging or is that not necessary?" the tech asks, "yeah, we'll need contrast" I reply. "It would be beneficial if the patient were to have a cannula for auto-inject prior to coming to the department" the tech says, "yeah, of course, I'll get that sorted" I reply. "Perfect, we should be ready in about half an hour" I am informed before they hang up.

I sigh, making my way to the adolescent department and into the supply room, grabbing what I need to insert another cannula for her. "Hey sunshine" I say as I walk in and wash my hands. "Hey Mikey" she mumbles, "have you ever had a chest CT sweetheart?" I ask as I dry my hands. She nods, "alright, are you ok if I put another cannula in so we can do contrast with the imaging?" I ask, leading to a sigh and another nod. I chuckle as I move to sit on my stool next to her, "the contrast isn't nice is it?" I ask, smirking. "It's so weirddd" she complains, "it's quick though" I say, "but I hate the feeling, it makes my whole body hot" she says. "Yeah, the contrast does that for most people, know it's not ideal but I reckon you can handle it" I smile. My patient rolls her eyes but smiles back at me, "are you ok if I do it now?" I ask, placing my tray of equipment out of her view. She nods again, turning to hold out her arm, allowing me to hold it. "Thanks sweetie" I say, taking her arm and tightening a tourniquet around it. I look at the veins on the inside of her arm, seeing that they look very weak, "have you been drinking enough water Ellie?" I ask, she just shakes her head. I sigh, "alright, lets give this a go" I say, sliding on a pair of gloves.

I find a vein that I think might work, leading me to stretch on a pair of gloves and wipe the area clean. Ellie inhales shakily at this, "talk to me sweetie, what's going on in that pretty little mind of yours?" I ask, sensing her anxiety. "It's fine, I'm ok" she says quickly, "no Ellie, tell me what you're thinking" I say, not wanting her to have to go silent again. She takes a deep breath, "I just get nervous with lines because I've had so many things go wrong" she says. "Ok sweetie, I know complications can be scary but I want you to trust me, the major one you're worried about doesn't happen with cannulas, it's a needle, not a wire, parts won't snap off" I try to reassure, "if anything else happens, we just take it out, alright, if it's hurting or if you feel like something's wrong, tell me straight away and we'll figure it out together, ok" I say. Ellie takes a deep breath before nodding, "don't feel bad though if there are complications, I'm expecting them but I... I trust you to help fix it" she says. I look down, somewhat guiltily, she's obviously been through hell at hospitals before and I just have to reinforce all the trauma she's experienced.

"You can do it now" she whispers, making me look up. "Alright Elle, I don't wanna try too many times, so if after the second time, it's not working, we'll stop and have them do manual inject" I say, making her nod. I nod back before taking her arm. I re-clean the area and take the needle, "little sting sunshine" I warn before pushing the needle into her arm. It doesn't work...

Ellie stares at her arm and chuckles to herself slightly, "let me try to move it around honey, see if I can get it in, it seems like your vein just r-" I am cut off, "rolled away" she says quietly and I nod. She nods back, allowing me to try to move the needle into the vein. I pull it back and try again but to no avail. "Alrighty, I'm gonna try again, but if it doesn't work, we won't put your little body through any more, yeah" I suggest, she just nods again, still staring at her arm. I grab a cotton ball, pressing it on the insertion site before pulling out the cannula. I hold pressure to it until the bleeding has stopped (which doesn't take long because it didn't even get into the vein) before putting a bandaid on it.

I dispose of the sharp before rolling back over to my patient and retightening the tourniquet around her arm, "lets try this again" I say before carefully sliding the needle into a vein. I sigh in relief when I immediately get blood return. Ellie sighs at this too, glad that we have gotten further with this one than last time. I carefully twist a flush onto the end of the cannula before gently pushing the saline through the line. I'm filled with concern when I am met with resistance as I attempt to flush the line. Ellie clenches her eyes closed and bites her lip softly, "is it hurting sunshine?" I ask carefully, receiving a silent nod. "Yeah, ok" I mumble to myself, "I might try pulling it back a bit, but if it gets too sore tell me to stop" I say, receiving another nod, "it's blown hasn't it" she whispers. I sigh, "I think so darling" I reply as I try to pull the line back into the vein. "I'm going to try to flush it one more time alright? Tell me if it's too much" I warn before pushing the plunger on the syringe, once again being met with immediate resistance. I sigh and hang my head when I see that the saline I have just pushed has formed a bubble under the skin of Ellie's arm instead of followed the vein, confirming that it has blown.

I sigh before pulling the tube out of my patient's hand and giving her a cold pack to try to prevent bruising. "Sorry lovely, I won't try again, they can just do manual inject" I say as I dispose of my mess. Ellie just nods, "Crystal will take you downstairs soon and I'll get the results when you're done" I inform before leaving my patient to her thoughts and walking out of the room.