Scared Of Healing

HITH?

I have just been sent Ellie's CT scan and have a moment to sit and look over it before sending it to the guys at Sydney Children's Hospital. I sit in my office and pull up the scans, scrolling through the images. I sigh as I see the developing bronchiectasis affecting her airways. I am not surprised at what I see though because this condition is common as CF progresses, it's just disappointing because I know it's pieces of her lungs that we can't get back.

I send the scans off to the hospital in Sydney before realising that it is time for Crystal and I to go home. I quickly make my way up to the adolescent ward to see my wife bidding farewell to her friends before she spots me and walks over. I smile and look down to plant a kiss on the top of her head before we start walking to the elevators. Crystal races me to press the button for the car park and I chuckle at her competitiveness.

We get home relatively quickly since there isn't much traffic in the middle of the day. Crystal waltzes into the house and I follow close behind, chuckling at my wife. We make our way up to our room and quickly change out of our scrubs. Crystal wants to get some sleep so we are both going to go to bed, first though, she wants a "nice relaxing bath". So she draws herself a bath while I brush my teeth and I give my wife a kiss before hopping into bed and getting straight onto my laptop, doing some research as my wife relaxes into her bath.

I open my laptop and rest it on my knees, doing some research on the progression of bronchiectasis as I hear Crystal get out of the bath and begin to brush her teeth. My wife then walks into the room and comes to sit next to me in our bed. I turn to give her a kiss as I shut my laptop, "what are you looking at?" she mumbles, smiling before pulling out of the kiss. "Just some research to see if I can be helping Ellie more" I reply and she nods, humming in response. I smile at my wife confusedly, knowing she has something to say but isn't saying it. "What?" I ask playfully and she takes a deep breath, "who does Ellie have to go to when she gets better?" she asks. I sigh, "SCH is working on finding her file, but from what I understand, she doesn't have her parents" I answer. She nods and hums again, "I had a thought..." she says. I reposition myself to look at my wife properly, "I know it's a bit out there and isn't necessarily protocall, but..." she continues and I smile, encouraging her to continue. "Like, it doesn't have to happen, but maybe we could foster her... just until her family can figure things out" Crystal says quietly, obviously not sure how I'm going to respond. I sigh, "honestly baby, I would love to, I just don't know if she trusts us enough for that..." I say, "...and obviously the boys would have to have some input" I add. Crystal nods her head before resting it on my shoulder, "the boys are fine with it" she mumbles. I sit up, "you've already spoken to the boys?" I ask. Crystal nods, "I didn't want to put the idea in your head if there was no chance of it happening, I know you love her" my wife says.

We sit silently for a few minutes before I speak up, "if she wanted to though, it would be better. It would be great if when she gets a bit better that we could do HITH so she could get out of the hospital" I say. Crystal nods, "you think she could transition to Hospital In The Home?" she asks, "eventually" I reply. "Maybe we should have a conversation with her next shift" I say and Crystal nods happily, "don't get your hopes up though baby, there's a lot of considerations here" I remind, and my wife keeps nodding.