Dear Diary (Larry Stylinson)

Public Tears

Dear Diary,

I cried onstage tonight. The whole crowd watched me tear up in front of them, but I couldn't help it. I just got so emotional while thinking of Lou. Before I go on, let me explain.

The album (first one without the other boys) came out four months ago. I've been on tour for about a month now, and I haven't had the time to write until today. I wanted to have some alone time after this last concert to gather my thoughts and dry my tears. I feel like an emotional wreck right now, so I figured I should write some to get my feelings out.

So one of the last songs I sang tonight was Sweet Creature. I sang every word like I would if Louis were sitting right next to me, listening quietly. As I sang, I couldn't get him off my mind. I couldn't get rid of all the memories for even a second. He's the sweetest creature in the world. How can someone be so perfect? Louis is an angel that this world doesn't deserve. It's all I could think about while singing, so I teared up and got really emotional.

Louis. No longer my Louis. He'll never be mine again. Ever.

I feel like crying again, but I'm holding back. I've cried enough tears, and it's pathetic. All of my fans think I'm so strong, but can't they see that I'm broken? No matter how many smiles and laughs I give the world, they never see that most of them are forced. They never see that I'm just acting. Why can't anyone recognize a broken person?

Niall called a couple nights ago. He told me that my album was amazing and that he didn't know how I write songs like that. I'm grateful for him. He's one beam of light in my dark life. So is Liam, but he hasn't called in a while.

Niall asked me again how I was doing. I didn't break down into tears this time. I told him I still wasn't good, but that I've been crying less and less. He told me that I was going to be okay...oh to hear Louis say those words to me.

I'll write again when the tour is over. I don't have much time as it is, so it might be a while.

All the love,

X




(A/N) I hate it when Harry cries. It makes me want to cry too.

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I almost have 90 reads on this!!! Thanks guys!

X