Him - Monsta X Short Story

twenty-three.

We spent the whole day together, Minhyuk, Aria, and I. Any time Aria needed anything, I stepped up to help him. We came home to Jooheon helping Benji with his homework as dinner was being made. "2 and 2, makes what buddy?" He asked, leading him to get two red M&Ms and two blue M&Ms.

"One, two... three... four!" Benji smiled. Jooheon clapped happily with him, letting him eat the M&Ms. "Oh, you're gonna have to tell Dada I eat candy before dinner. Dang it." That was a rule of the house, when it came to the kids, zero secret keeping. No matter how big or small. There was no "don't tell dada, okay?" That shit died with me.

I chuckled softly, walking up behind him, kissing his forehead. "Don't worry, Bubba. You did so good, I think you deserve it." I turned to see Minhyuk setting Aria's car seat down. "Oh, I'll put her to bed, babe." I needed to show Minhyuk I cared equally. I unbuckled Aria from her car seat, taking her upstairs to bed.

Jooheon came into my room, closing the door. "How was it?" He asked softly. "I came home to see Benji's room messed up."

I sighed a bit. "Minhyuk was ready to walk out on me before I even mentioned the date. But then we ended up with him crying, him begging me not to leave. He brought up how it didn't take me this long to adjust to Benji, Hyungwon dying, and told me I was ruining his dream, and that he didn't know if he could be married to me if I didn't want to be a part of the dream. If it was possible that I couldn't l-love her." My voice cracked at the end as Jooheon's jaw dropped. I looked down at the sleeping baby in her bassinet, putting her close to my side of the bed.

"Wow," Minhyuk piped up, looking at us. We absolutely didn't hear the door open. "So, now we're talking about me behind my back?" He scoffed. "You're lucky we don't have rings yet, I swear to God, I'd throw it at your face!" He slammed the door, causing Aria to wake up crying. I heard Benji downstairs, starting to cry.

Jooheon took Aria as I rushed downstairs. "Benji, baby. Go upstairs, put on your favorite song okay? Use Jooheon's playlist, ask him for it." He nodded, running upstairs. "Minhyuk!" I snapped, turning him around. "I don't care how much you hate me right now, you do not get to traumatize my son or our daughter. You don't get to do that." Minhyuk softened after I had called Aria our daughter. That's when I knew something was wrong. "We need to talk," I sighed, leading him to the couch.

As we sat down, Minhyuk showed me something else was wrong. "I'm sorry, I overreacted. Don't leave me. I didn't mean to."

I shook my head, taking his hand. "I'm not leaving you, baby." I bit my lip, not knowing how to approach this. "But I can tell you and Jooheon are brothers." He furrowed his eyebrows.

"Of course we're brothers, what are you talking about?" Minhyuk asked.

I sighed softly, not wanting to upset him. "I'm concerned. Lately, you've been mood swinging back and forth. Between loving me and finding a chance to hate my guts. And I love you, I do. But you're scaring me. I don't know how to say this."

He rolled his eyes, sitting back. "What, you think I'm crazy?" He asked.

"No," I stared blankly. "And when I'm using Jooheon as an example, don't you dare use the word crazy. He's not crazy, we're not crazy. We have mental battles we need to fight. And Jooheon can't be diagnosed with this, but you can. In fact, 40% of people may be misdiagnosed with bipolar."

Minhyuk's interest was piqued. "So, you don't think I'm bipolar. What do you think I have, Mr. Psychiatrist?" He was irritated but I had no way to say it without being blunt.

I looked him in the eye, facing him fully. "I think you're struggling with borderline personality disorder. And I need you to get evaluated."

It was like I zapped the life out of him. "H-How do you know? What do you know?" Minhyuk asked.

Now for a secret I kept very well. "My mama had it. And even though I understood her when I found out, I couldn't excuse the fact that she oscillated between loving me and hating me, putting her relationships before me, attaching to them and being a mess when they left, then blaming me for it... I couldn't accept that because she never got her for it. Never went to therapy, never got medication, she did nothing to save her mental health or mine." Minhyuk reached up to wipe my tears. "And I love you so fucking much. It would kill me if I had to walk away because you refused to help yourself. And speaking as the child of a parent with unresolved BPD, don't do that to our baby. She wouldn't deserve the person you could become. She deserves you, healthy, happy you. Just make an appointment to see. Maybe you're overrun with emotions and I'm seeing something that's not there. But please don't ignore it. Please."

Minhyuk enveloped me in a tight hug, kissing my forehead. "Okay, okay, Kihyun." He shushed me as I finally let go of all the sadness and fear I'd been feeling. "I'll go, I promise. I love our family and I wanna be good for us. I'll make an appointment tomorrow." I nodded, wiping my tears away.

After a moment of just existing together, we finally got up. "Jooheon! Help Benji wash up for dinner please!" I called, heading to the kitchen to start preparing plates. It was taco night, so tacos and nachos were on the menu.

Not long after I made his plate, Benji came running downstairs, happy as could be. He didn't hear anything, thank God. "I want nachos!" He smiled. Luckily, I knew my child.

"Here you are, your majesty." I set his plate down in front of him. "Chips, meat, and ooey gooey nacho cheese!" I smiled, handing him a fork.

Jooheon was next up and Minhyuk had his plate ready. "Hard shell tacos, shredded cheese, tomatoes, sour cream, and lettuce, no onions." Jooheon smiled softly, thanking him for his plate.

I made my plate, opting for a small plate of nachos. "Do you guys want cinnamon chips for dessert?" I asked.

"Uhm, yes? I'll always check my sugar for cinnamon chips," Jooheon said. I chuckled softly.

Minhyuk smiled a little, making a quick soft shell taco. "I'm gonna go to bed," he sighed, kissing my cheek. "I love you guys, goodnight."

Everyone said goodnight except for me, but I couldn't stop parenting for the moment. As dinner finished, I went to put Benji to bed as Jooheon got started on dishes. Benji was sleepy before we even turned out the light after his story. "Min," I mumbled, opening our door.

He glanced up at me, eyes squinting as I'd turned on the light. "What?" He asked. "Can you turn the light back off, I have a migraine." I nodded, turning it off again.

"Just wanted to make sure you were okay." I was more relieved to hear he had a migraine than not. I snuggled into bed next to him, kissing his forehead. "I love you," I mumbled. He nodded, holding my arms around his waist, falling asleep. I felt really bad that I could've hurt him, but I was terrified that he was struggling and I hated to see it.