Regency in Diagon Alley [Theodore Nott | Harry Potter AU]

Chapter Thirty-Seven

The sight of hyacinths brightened the dark walls of the drawing room that were covered with mute portraits and ancient artifacts. To say it was the second time since Carina leaned down and smelt the flowers was a lie, every time she passes by them, she would lean down and take a whiff of them. Of home. As much as she loved Nott Manor with its fresh air and privacy, she did miss the garden in Grimmauld Place, her room, the tower, Barrow and the other servants, the portraits that hung on the wall, and the maze that was London and Londinium.

But the flower was not there for her to simply admire, it was there to bring her comfort after the visit from the Healer.

Carina with the company of Regulus and Malia – the latter's presence and gift of hyacinths surprised her – they returned to Nott Manor to relay the news. Theodore was in his study, Minty informed them when they came back and was asked to not be disturbed, but as soon as they settled in the drawing room, discussing about their plans to help her predicament, he appeared looking as anxious as her.

To her relief, Regulus and Malia left as soon as they came to Nott Manor, with the former having to see an urgent meeting, and the latter being called to work.

"There's not much a problem," Carina said.

"Then why the nervous look?" Theodore asked as he observed her doting on the flowers.

"It's just... the Healer said that my hips were smaller than she hoped. It would make childbirth harder."

"But conception, there's no problem, yes?" Voice slightly cracking.

She shook her head. "The Healer suggests – to have a more successful result – to alter my meals, more nutrition... I guess I have to lay off the wine and whiskey for now."

"I'll drink for two then," Theodore teased. "So, I guess I should have the servants prepare a more nutritious meal for lunch – more vegetables, I hear fish is good, and for dessert, I'm sure fruit will be best—"

Carina grabbed his elbow, startling him. She looked at him in the eye with so much emotion – anger, sadness, fear, he wasn't sure, but he what he was sure was that it was that bad for Carina to suddenly tear up. "I am grateful that you're taking care of me, that you're helping me, but you must stop with this." She took a breath. "Stop making it seem we're preparing for a child because it will only hurt us both."

Oh, that's right.

Reality struck harder than it should.

Theodore knew. He reminded himself of their situation, that whatever they had now was temporary. In the end, Carina will still marry Cedric Diggory and he will marry some other lady. In the end Carina will have a family with another man, she will learn to love that man... and yet when Minty told him of their return from the healer, his heart was hammering in his chest, his mind racing to possibilities to plans they would take to make it happen. So, they could have that child only to be reminded of reality.

Maybe it was pride because he ripped his arm from her grasp. "I am aware of our agreement."

She closed her eyes. "Don't do this, Theodore."

"Do what?" He wasn't sure why he was angry, at who. "If it's becoming hard for you, Carina, then maybe it's time that stop this."

Carina stepped back, hurt in her eyes but she glared at him, kept her chin up and walked away. Theodore called her name; she did not answer. He chased her out of the drawing room and grabbed her arm. "Carina, please –"

"I'm not speaking to you while you're like this –"

"You think walking away will help?" He scoffed.

"That's a lot coming from you," she cynically chuckled. "So, you get to walk out – hell, leave the bloody country when you're hurt but I can't leave the room when I'm hurt?" Theodore kept silent; he did not trust himself to say anything without letting the sob in his throat coming out. "I understand what you're feeling, Theodore – I understand how you felt because that was how I was when I was in that Healer's clinic.