i broke the silence for you

xii. accelerando

it was not until that day
when i decided to take a leap of faith
and shift up
for the climax of tchaikovsky's romeo and juliet
because
this is love
this is love
this is love

     brett had never actually kissed someone in his whole life, so it was no wonder that he had no idea what to do when eddy had closed the gap between their lips.

     his only thoughts of how soft eddy's tongue was and how great his lips tasted. brett's knees weakened as the kiss prolonged. he squeezed his eyes shut and pulled eddy closer, eager to pull more of his affection in, desperate to let go of the world that held him down and float away, leaving all his worries down on the ground below him. a flower that had bloomed before seemed to have shaken the dust off of it, revealing its true sunkissed hue, the gentle glow of the evening sun that was hovering above the horizon as if it decided to lengthen the day just so it could witness them. brett opened his eyes just a slit and stole a peek at eddy, gripping the back of his collar and pulling him in, hoping that this wasn't a product of his imagination.

       brett pulled away reluctantly for a breath and stared into eddy's glossy eyes, the stars seeming to rest in them. the last light of the day poured in from the window behind eddy's tall frame, outlining him in an ethereal glow. brett's breath was quick and deep, knees shaking, toes curled, and the world spinning with eddy's taste still fluttering on his lips.

     realization was crushed into that single breath, but it was all pushed aside as eddy connected their lips again. eddy's large hands seemed to be the only things stopping him from collapsing. his breath washed over him like an ocean wave, the sun striking through the troubled surface as they seemed to float, his breath taken from him. brett's fingers seemed like someone else's as the creeped under eddy's shirt, his warm skin meeting his hands.

     brett's grip tightened for a reason that he wasn't aware of at first. his legs gave way, but eddy's arms around his waist kept him from hitting the ground. the taller boy lifted him from the ground and carried him to the couch, setting him down.

     it took a bit for brett to recollect himself and finally breathe normally again, the events that happened just seconds before rushing and spinning around his head like they were marbles being shaken in a jar. his thundering heart sounded loudly and he pressed his hand to his chest as if eddy could hear it as well.

    "i—i can't believe i just did that," eddy breathed.

     brett shook his head, then realized his response was pretty random, so he responded quietly, "yeah."

     "you okay?" eddy asked, reaching forward. "i'm sorry if that was weird, if—"

     "no." brett placed a hand lightly on eddy's arm. "it's okay."

     "if you're tired, you can. . . " eddy trailed off. brett hung back for a few moments in case eddy continued. even though it was still dusk, he nodded and headed to the guest room.

~ ♪ ~

     eddy stood still in the middle of the living room. the sun had set only a few minutes ago, but eddy felt like the early darkness had been there forever, like brett was his sun and if he went away, everything would turn into shadows. his heart wouldn't stop racing. emotions spilled over him like a relentless ocean wave, submerging him in confusion, epiphany, and relief.

     i finally found love.

     his heart ached from the ghost of brett's touch.

     i found love.

     unexpected tears escaped from inside him and he put both of his hands over his mouth, the tears building up behind his eyelids as his lips curled into an almost fought back smile, a few hiccoughs sounding out. he sniffed as the tears rolled down his face.

     i'm loved.

     the rest of the ocean leaked out, along with a heavy gasp. his tangled emotions rolled around inside him, that little hole in his heart seeming to become the light at the end of the tunnel rather than a missing piece.

~ ♪ ~

     eddy woke up on the couch the next morning, the tears from last night sealing his eyes shut. when he opened them, his eyes fell on the digital clock that was hung up on the wall. he panicked instinctively and ran into his room and get ready for rehearsal, but realization hit him before he could even open the door. a series of wistful thoughts strung themselves in eddy's mind, finally leading to brett.

     he turned around and peered into the guest room. the door was open, allowing eddy to see brett laying angelically on the bed. eddy carefully closed the door, making sure not to make any noise. he padded down the hall and back to the living room, pulling out his phone.

     he still had to purchase plane tickets for them. eddy had lived in brisbane for his whole life, and he honestly had no idea what to expect. eddy had no idea if he was scared or excited to leave his only home.

     well, it hasn't really been a home after his mother died.

     eddy shook his head in an attempt to send those thoughts out of his mind, but all that did was have them hide in a corner, very noticeable but ignored. don't think about that. that was fourteen years ago. don't let it consume you again.

     "eddy?"

     that sweet, deep voice flew over eddy's shoulder, lighting a small candle in eddy's heart and illuminating everything again. he turned and walked over to brett, taking both of his hands. "good morning." brett nodded and pulled eddy into an embrace. "do you need something?" eddy asked, lifting brett's chin so he could tell that the taller man was saying something. brett stared at him blankly for a few moments, then shook his head.

     eddy pulled brett closer like a stuffed animal, and brett responded by wrapping his arms tighter around eddy's waist like a little koala. eddy smiled at the thought.

     eddy wanted to stay like this forever. his—their uncertain future loomed before him. he had no idea what was going to happen and he feared all the possible outcomes; what if he chose wrong? what if he messed up and lost everything all over again? eddy unconsciously tightened his arms around brett.

     "ah—" brett gasped, pushing eddy's chest a bit to signal him to loosen his grip. "eddy, you alright?"

     "yeah," eddy responded instinctively. "please don't worry."

     "then stop making me worry," brett said. "really. if there's anything, i'm here."

    "thank you." eddy placed a gentle kiss on brett's forehead. "really. you're everything. i really hope you're always with me."

a/n:
mwahaha short chapter