Mr John: my brother in christ, I fear that i've made a horrible mistake
Mr Laurence: repent for your sins, and tell Romeo that Juliet isn't really dead she's just faking
Mr John: Yeah...can't do that
Mr Laurence: Why not?
Mr John: I kinda was watching some things in class
Mr Laurence: Oh my god John, is this about your step sister porn addiction
Mr John: Yeah...
Mr Laurence: The poor boy is gonna kill himself on a maybe lesbian. That will be so traumatic for her