Paris was just standing outside of Juliet's grave, like Ophelia asked of him. He was minding his own business when Romeo just punched him across the face for no fucking reason. "HOW DARE YOU DISRESPECT JULIET'S TOMB" and then he barked at him.
"Dude! Juliet's alive, she should be waking up any moment now," Paris said.
"I don't believe you," Romeo said and then spat on his face.
"God! I'll show you then!" Paris said, grabbing Romeo's hand and then yanks him into the mausoleum. Juliet laid there holding a bundle of chrysanthemums. Little did Romeo know, Ophelia was hiding in the dark watching everything going on and making sure nothing bad happened.
"She's dead! Look at her!" Romeo screamed.
"You're such an idiot!" Paris shouted back, "She's been 'dead' for three days and she's not even rotting!" Romeo took another look at Juliet. She looked like she was sleeping, her breath was slowed, but if Romeo looked closely he could see a small up and down in her chest.
"Oh my God, Juliet's alive," Romeo whispers. Paris rolls his eyes at this and Juliet's doe eyes open slowly.
"Thank you Paris," Juliet whispers, Romeo feels hurt that Juliet hasn't acknowledged him yet, "Do you know where Ophelia is?"
"She's here, don't worry. You might wanna explain everything to Romeo," Paris recommends. Juliet nods and smiles at Romeo. Romeo reaches in to kiss her, and Juliet stops him with her hand.
"Romeo, a lot has happened since you've been gone," Juliet said, giggling. Ophelia got out of her hiding spot and sat down next to Juliet. Juliet jumped into her lap, and Romeo's heart sank.
"Oh," Romeo whispered.
"Romeo, it's nothing with you," Juliet swears, "I just, I don't know how I truly felt about you. I know that I like Ophelia."
"But we were gonna run away together," Romeo whispered.
"Buddy," Ophelia said, patting his shoulder, "Just, let her be happy." Romeo contemplates this and nods. Romeo watches the way that Juliet leans on Ophelia, how she keeps her eyes locked on Ophelia, and how absolutely happy she looked.
Romeo realized that he never looked that happy ever. "I'm sorry Romeo-" Juliet tried.
"Don't apologize!" Romeo promises, "you're happier now right?" Juliet smiles, and grabs Ophelia's hand. She doesn't answer, but Romeo knows. Ophelia will be good to her, he knows it. He needs to apologize to Mercutio and Tybalt.
"Hey, do you guys wanna go see Mercutio?" Ophelia asks.
"Wait, how do you know Mercutio?" Romeo questions.
Ophelia opens her phone and shows Romeo a photo. Romeo didn't know Ophelia was trans, so it was strange to see her pre-transition holding Mercutio's shoulder throwing up a peace sign. This was when the two were eight or nine, at camp. Mercutio looks very nervous and not nearly as confident as Ophelia. "We went to camp together," Ophelia adds.
"Alright," Paris says crossing his arms, "But Mercutio will want booze or something. Do any of you have a fake ID?"
Romeo and Juliet look at each other and burst out laughing. "What?" Paris and Ophelia ask in unison.
"We'll steal some of my dad's," Romeo says, laughing so hard he's snorting, "let's get outta here it smells like death."
The group piled into Paris's car. It's one of those rich people's cars that can barely fit three people, so Juliet has to sit on Ophelia's lap, which she wont complain about. "Juliet," Romeo begs, "I'm so-"
"Don't worry about it!" Juliet says, "We were being stupid. First time we received affection eh?" Romeo is very confused on how Juliet became Canadian.
"Hey Paris, do you need me to put in the directions or-"
"Nah I got it."
They pull into the Montague mansion's drive through and Romeo runs in to steal some booze. He runs out holding the packs liquor over his head. Romeo pops the trunk and throws it into the back.
The group pulls up to the hospital and just breaks in because it's Verona. They get into the elevator and go up to the floor Mercutio's on. "Hold on guys," Juliet says, checking her phone. Tybalt texted her his floor and room a while back. She hits the button and waves at her friends and girlfriend.
She walks down the hall to Tybalt's room. She just barges in, and Tybalt fucking screams. "DON'T HURT ME GHOST!" He yells.
"Oh my god you idiot," Juliet says rolling her eyes, "I'm not dead. How's your leg doing?"
"Better," Tybalt says, very confused.
"Good. I came here because I wanted to tell you something. You know Ophelia?" Tybalt nods skeptically, "Yeah I knew that I guess. Well, we're dating."
Tybalt smiles. "You're dating Ophelia?"
"Yep."
"And not that ugly bitch Romeo?"
"Yep."
Tybalt nods. "Awesome."
"You don't care?" Juliet asks, a giant smile growing across her face."
"That you like women? No, why would I care about that? I'm literally bi."
Juliet blushes nervously. "I didn't know that-"
"Yeah no shit," Tybalt says rolling his eyes, "your dad is super homophobic. Where are you gonna stay? You faked your death."
"You'd hate me," Juliet says, a knowing smile growing across her face. Before Tybalt can say anything, she runs out and gets in the elevator.
She runs into Mercutio's room. "Juliet! Juliet! Juliet!" Mercutio chants. Juliet waves and sits down on the floor.
"Let's play truth or dare," Romeo suggests.
"Wait! Before we do" Juliet says, clapping her hands above her head. "Ophelia, Tybalt says my dad's homophobic. I don't doubt him can I-"
Ophelia kisses her. "Live with me? Sure."
"Booo," Mercutio yells, "Less talking, more daring."
Juliet throws her hands up in the air. "Ophelia," Paris asks, "Who was your first crush?"
"Easy, Shego from Kim Possible," Ophelia says and takes a swig of the liquor. "Shit that stuff's hard."
"Yeah no shit."
The group sits there, they drink and laugh. They make fun of each other, and for the first time ever Juliet feels weightless and happy.
So like I said, this isn't a tragedy. Juliet and Romeo don't kill themselves for each other, but they become friends. Maybe no one dies, but do stories need to have death? I don't think so. I think we should give these tragic women a break. Let them rest.
