Mr Wife ☑️

chapter 07: Heart to heart talk

Sky's POV

"Yahh!" My mom screams while we're having our dinner.

The old man and I look up at him in confusion. He's so engrossed in his phone which he don't normally do. He strictly disallow using phones during meal times. So, it was already surprising he's the one that's actually using and now he's screaming as well.

"What happened, Sidney?" Old man asks.

"Sky, baby, my friend's son agreed to marry you." Mom exclaims happily while looking at me.

He's looking so happy, his eyes are literally staring starts.

I too smile at him with a nod. Well, I think it's settled then. But why am I not happy? I was the one who told mom to ask them for marriage and when they agreed I'm not happy, instead I feel bad.

"Um.. Sky, are you not happy?" Mom queries, his smile fading slowly.

"No, mama!" I utter strongly, "I'm happy." I force out a smile to make him believe.

"I'm happy as well, baby. Then should we start planning the wedding and make arrangements? I hope it won't be delayed and finishes as fast as possible." Mom says and I nod yet again.

"Start planning, mama. Let everything happen according to your liking." I tell him.

"Um? How can that be possible, Sky? It's your wedding, everything should happen according to your interest." Mom disagrees with me.

"Mama, you know, right, what you like I like it too. So, don't worry and just plan." I assure him.

"Hmm.. okay, then." Mom nods and we go back to eating.

Our dinner goes smoothly without any more talking and we go back to our respective rooms after. I get in the room and close the door before walking to the bed and sitting on the edge. What's wrong with me? Why does my heart feel so heavy? It feels like I'm doing something that I shouldn't do. The marriage, it's not at all giving me happiness. I thought I'll marry someone who mom chooses and settle to make him happy but now that it's almost going to happen, it's giving me a heavy feeling.

"Sky, I'm going in." Suddenly, I hear my old man's voice and when I look at the door I find him entering my room.

He steps in, closes the door and locks it before walking to me. He sits on the couch in front of me and watches me intensely.

"What?" His looks are disturbing me, it's like he knows what I'm feeling and I'm not okay with it.

"Are you really okay with this marriage?" He queries.

"Of course, it's me who told mom to ask them about marriage, why wouldn't I be okay?" I shrug off, trying to sound strong.

"I know what you're feeling, Sky, even if you don't tell me." He sighs and his eyes show concern, "you don't want to marry, do you? You're feeling as if your heart is getting reaped into parts but you don't know why."

"I-I don't know what I'm feeling, dada." I slip down the bed and sit at his legs while keeping my face on his knees.

The way he knew what I'm feeling even without me telling it out loud, I knew this is the time I let go of everything and put my heart open to him. My old man and I may not be that close to each other but he knows everything that's happening in me, my feelings and emotions. He's my father, after all. My grandma used to say I resemble my old man so much, maybe that's just not in looks but feelings as well.

"You can't put a word to what you're feeling, Sky but I know that feeling very well. It's that feeling when you have to take a step forward in your life but you're afraid of letting go of something that you've been holding onto until now. I had the same feeling when I was arranged to marry your mama years ago. I disagreed with my mom to marry again because I couldn't forget your birth mother. I was still lingering in her feels. Your grandma made so many accepts and failed. At the end she told me even if I don't want a partner, you and River should have a mother. It was then I finally agreed to marry again. Just like you I too agreed to marry but then I was fighting within myself with the decision I made. One side, I don't have a choice and have to marry for my kids. And on the other side, I couldn't let go of my feelings for my late wife. It was hell. And I was in that state for so long, even after marrying your mama."

"But then he slowly changed me, it was never intentional thought. All he did was to take care of you and River like his own children. Not only you both, but my parents and I too. He took care of everyone. Slowly things changed so as my feelings but even then I couldn't forget my late wife. It felt as I was cheating on her, like I'm so easily moving on from her and having a happy time again. Like I'm giving the love that's reserved for her to someone's else. It was suffocating and I was suffering because I want to welcome my second phase in life but at the same time I couldn't with how I hold on to my past. It was then realisation hit me. I was suffering because I chose it. If only I let of my past and welcome my present and future, everything would turn our better. And it did. I heart fully and happily let go of the hold I was holding onto my past. That doesn't mean I forget it, no, just leave it as the past so that I can be happy at my present and in my future as well. And you can see how happy I'm now. I moved on and embraced the new beginning which changed my life completely for the better. That's your mama, he's literally the happiness of my life."

"I know you don't have a past like me but the thing that you're holding onto is the love that you have for your mama. It's scaring you that you have to share it with someone while all this time it's solely given to him. You're scared to give importance to someone as much as or even more than that you do to your mother. I understand it, Sky. But you too need to understand that it's not how you're thinking. By marrying you're not going to stop loving your mother, rather you will share the same love with someone else. Firstly you need to keep in mind that the one you're marring is going to be yours, he's not an outsider. It's your responsibility to love him and keep him happy, all the time. When you have that feeling, you don't feel you're betraying someone to make other person. Just let go and everything falls accordingly. You know, right, you can love your mother and your husband at the same time and in the same way just like how your mother loves me but loves you as well. It all lies within us." My old man explains my situation better than I understand myself.

His words hits me, each and every word is so true and real. I know I'm not really happy because marrying means slowly going away from my mama. He had been the one I loved since I can remember and now to bring someone into my life is a huge thing. It's like I'm replacing him and giving the love that belongs to him to someone else. These thoughts were literally eating my mind up. But with the conversation with my old man, he made me realise I can just welcome something new without without letting go of the present and future with mom but actually letting go of the negative thoughts that's holding onto us. Maybe, I too can slowly start changing and live my life better.

"Sky, baby, are you asleep? Did you see your father, I can't find him anywhere." My thoughts snap when I hear mom's voice outside my room.

I look up at my old man who is smirking.

"Well, I need to go now. My husband is calling. He just can't stay a minute without me." Old man states proudly.

I shake my head at him and move away from him before getting up. He too gets up and opens the door himself.

"Eli, you're here." Mom calls him surprised.

"Yeah, came here to give medicine to sky because he's not well." He answers mom.

"Baby, are you not well?" Mom looks past the old man and queries me with worry.

"I'm fine, mama." I smile at him genuinely.

I'm fine now.