Crossing Lines

23. A bum leg

We'd won the game but as I walked out of the locker room I felt anything but happy. Somehow I'd finished the game. Honestly I didn't even know what happened the rest of the second half. My head was not on the field.

I was so confused but I was also beyond worried. But those weren't the emotions that I felt the most. That went to the fear that was currently taking over. I was scared for Jake but I was also scared because I was feeling any of it at all.

The realization of my feelings for Jake scared the shit out of me and I didn't know how to deal with it. What was I supposed to do now?

"Are you ok?" Jetson asked walking over to me.

I just stared at him blankly and nodded.

"Here thought you might want this." Jetson handed me a slip of paper.

"What?" I opened it to see the hospital name and a room number. "How did-?" It didn't take a genius to realize what this was.

"Go see your man." Jetson winked and then ran off to catch a ride back to the apartment with Monroe.

I just stared at the paper for a second. What was I supposed to say to him when I got there?

I was so fucking confused.

It all felt like a blur as I drove to the hospital. It was like my body was on autopilot the whole way just leading me exactly where I wanted to be. It lead me straight to Jake.

When I stepped into his room it was surprisingly empty besides the boy himself. I had thought it'd be filled with his teammates but he was alone.

He was laid out on the hospital bed one foot propped up in a cast.

"How's the leg?" I gestured to his hurt leg like an idiot.

"It's my ankle, I landed wrong and it just snapped." He replied.

The air between us felt so different and I didn't know if it was true or if my new found feelings were messing with my head. We didn't really talk like this, we didn't really speak outside of sex and standing there I had no clue what to even say.

What was I doing here? What was I thinking? I shouldn't have these feelings for him. It was just supposed to be sex. I could feel the panic starting to sweep in. Every second I spent looking at him here, hurt. I just couldn't do it.

"We can't do this anymore." I said not even looking at him. I was such a fucking coward. "I can't see you anymore."

I refused to turn to see the look on his face. I didn't know if I could handle whatever I found there if I did.

"You're seriously ending things with me while I'm laid up in the hospital? Really Evan? What you see I got a bum leg and decide I'm not a good enough fuck anymore? God I knew you were a fucking asshole but I never expected this." His voice was filled with emotion and each word felt like a knife to the heart.

"I-," I paused not trusting my ability to speak. "Sorry." I breathed out.

"You should go before my team gets back and sees you here." He spat out.

I didn't say anything to that knowing I'd fall apart if I even tried. I just turned and ran the hell out of there almost slamming into someone on my way out.

I was such a coward.

—

Jake's pov:

I knew this was what would happen. I knew it the second we kissed in that bar bathroom this would be the result. Every hookup, every second I spent with Evan I knew it was leading to this. I had told myself having just the smallest bit of Evan was better than nothing. I had thought that having my heart broken by him was better than never giving it a shot in the first place.

I was wrong.

This was worse than anything I could have imagined for myself. Evan had walked in here and ripped my heart out and stomped on it. He left me shattered all over the hospital room like it was nothing.

I had no time to even process, to try to pull myself together before Adam walked in. Luckily he decided to keep his mouth shut. He didn't say anything about the heartbreak I knew was written all over my face and he made no comment on the fact I knew he saw Evan leaving.

He did keep looking at me with these concerned glances that might be worse than actually asking me about it. But I didn't want to talk about it. I knew if I tried I'd fall apart completely.

My ankle and heart broken all in one day. My life was going so well.

"My baby!" My mom rushed into the room.

"Hi mom." I croaked out.

She wasted no time pulling me into a hug.

"Oh hon, it's going to be ok." She squeezed me extra hard.

"Did it hurt?" Maya my sister asked eyeing my leg.

"I did break my bone so yeah." I shot her a look.

"I was just asking." She huffed.

"Be nice to your brother." My mom scolded her.

If I didn't feel like death I might have laughed. Maya was an annoying little shit and she hadn't been nice to me since she was like five. I knew she loved me deep down but she'd never actually admit that.

"How are you feeling?" My dad asked walking over to give me a short hug.

"I feel better, drugs help." I did my best to make a joke.

" I bet they do." He chuckled.

I should be happy. All my people in one room. My ankle was an inconvenience especially since it meant I was out for the remainder of my senior season. I hadn't known it would be my last time on the football field when I stepped out tonight but I could still help my team win from the sidelines. I was bummed but it wasn't the end of the world.

So I should just be glad that it wasn't worse. I should feel that usual happiness I felt whenever I was surrounded by my family.

I felt none of it. I felt absolutely nothing. Maybe that's what happened when a blue eyed boy walked off with your heart.

It was a never ending type of torture but I let myself replay the image of him walking out over and over in my head. I wanted to remember that pain so that I'd never let myself go through this again.